In which an ex-employee of a Swiss bank offers to set Gilbert up as the next of kin to a deceased Yugoslavian oil trader, and to transfer the dead man's money into his bank account... at a price, of course. Will the scammer accept Gilbert's generous offer of free membership to his introduction agency? And if so, what sort of partner will Gilbert be able to find for the scammer?

Cast of characters

Gilbert Murray - proprietor of the Gilbert Murray Introduction Agency.
Ronald Knight - the aggrieved son of one of Gilbert's late clients.
Adrian Muster - allegedly an ex-Investment Manager of the Banca Unione di Credito in Switzerland.

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Investment opportunity

Sent: Wed, 11 May 2005 09:33:15 -0500

Hello,

The Banca Unione di Credito here in Switzerland is one of the largest Swiss banks licensed to operate private banking in Switzerland.

My name is Adrian Muster; and I used to work at the Banca Unione di Credito in Switzerland.

As an Investment Manager with the bank, I have handled a lot of secret, tax free investments offshore, which are not traceable for our numerous international private clients, which include Americans, Africans and Asians in line with their instructions. Because of the secrets and personal nature of these investments, we must work one on one with the clients to ensure full confidentiality.

The real purpose for contacting you is that I have a very small proposition and I need your co-operation.

Eight years ago a client I worked with, a Mr John de Balint, a Yugoslavian oil trader with Yukos Oil in Russia, invested a lot of money in four different time deposit accounts, each for a four year period in our offshore bank in the Cayman Islands.

Before the maturity of these investments, the bank was informed by the police of his death in an oilrig explosion.

At the time of his death he left a will and the will stated that his only son (who is in jail in Sri Lanka for drug offences on a 25 year sentence) was the only beneficiary to all his assets. Legally, the son cannot make the claim, so there is no next of kin to claim the funds.

The funds have been dormant for the last 36 months and by the instructions here at our Switzerland head office, it will be declared unclaimed by the bank very soon.

I just retired from the bank and I have spoken to Mr John de Balint's son about this proposal also. I am therefore compelled to seek your co-operation to salvage the investments for the son and the rest for the both of us. I have decided to contact you and provide you with the necessary documents and assistance so you can claim the funds as the next of kin to Mr John de Balint.

The son will also be confirming your identity to the bank as a known person to him, and the funds will be transferred to you, because he cannot claim it himself as the law forbids anyone currently associated with such criminal charges to make such a claim, and if these funds are not claimed soon; they will be deposited into the Swiss treasury as unclaimed funds. If this happens, no one can make claim to the money again.

You will have to hold 80% in lieu for the son and the balance can be shared between us based on our agreement.

Please respond immediately via any of my secure email addresses indicating your interest or otherwise, and more details and relevant documents that will help you understand my proposition and how to proceed.

adrian.muster@lugano.com

I am looking forward to your response and co-operation.

Respectfully,

Adrian Muster

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Regarding your interesting email

Sent: Wed, 11 May 2005 09:44:37

Dear Mr Muster,

I have just read the most interesting email that you sent me, regarding the funds of your deceased client, Mr John de Balint.

I have to say, Mr Muster, I was intrigued by your email, and by the proposition you put forward. I am a businessman, and I am currently on the lookout for funds to enable me to expand my business. It sounds as if your proposition could provide me with the funds I am looking for.

I am extremely interested in finding out some more details. Exactly how much money are we talking about here?

Please get back to me with more details as soon as you can.

I look forward to your positive response.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Business opportunity

Sent: Wed, 11 May 2005 08:42:29 -0400

Dear friend,

Thank you for the email response to my proposal.

I will like to put you through all the steps to make this deal conclusive and successful for all of us. I don't know you and you don't know me, but I would like to confide and trust in you as the success of this deal is very crucial.

One thing I will like you to do is to keep in touch regularly and respond to all my emails within 24 to 36 hours, or else I will conclude that you are no longer interested in helping me claim the funds.

When Mr John de Balint died, his accounts (four accounts) were added to a list of dormant accounts here in Switzerland. These accounts were viewed as dormant after three years when his only son, who is serving a life imprisonment term in Sri Lanka for drug trafficking, was not deemed responsible enough to place the claim. He (the son) has the accounts in question under the management of a group of financial advisors, who can only manage the funds with the bank, but they cannot move it from the bank.

Mr John de Balint's son does not want to give the advisors access to his father's wealth. As I told you, he is serving life imprisonment and with this knowledge, the financial advisors are prone to mismanage his father's assets in his absence.

The database where this account was added can be accessed at http://www.crt-ii.org/search.phtm. The deceased account holder's name or surname or both together can be used as the search criteria on this database.

As of the time of Mr John de Balint's death, I worked at the Zurich branch of Banca Unione di Credito, before I was transferred to the Geneva branch. A few years after the transfer, I was retired.

I have some access to some of Mr John de Balint's information from the bank files and these might come in relevant later with regards to the claim of the accounts.

I also have the original copy of the deceased's death certificate, which was provided to me by the deceased's son's attorney, after my visit to him in the Sri Lankan prison. He has agreed with my proposal as I put it to you and that is why I contacted you and I am looking for a reliable partner.

The total sum held in the term deposits, plus interest, amounts to $80.25 million (US currency). Eighty percent (80%) of this will be for the son and the other twenty percent (20%) will be for the both of us to share. I offer you five percent (5%) and I will take fifteen percent (15%). This is however negotiable on further discussion.

I have already given Mr Balint's son an upfront guarantee of $100,000 for the release of the death certificate to me by his attorneys, which will be required when claiming Mr Balint's assets as the next of kin.

The next step to proceed is to fill out the necessary claim forms and also get an attorney to represent all legal matters at the bank. I am suggesting that 50% of the attorney's fees be paid by my humble self and the other 50% by you. I don't have too much on me as of the moment and this is why I suggest this. A good attorney here in Switzerland costs at least 2,600 euros. I will make more inference to this after your consent is given to proceed as I planned.

Not to worry, the bank will not ask you for your relation to the deceased, but they will contact the son and confirm your identity and also inform him of the claim being placed on his father's accounts. On your agreement, I will proceed to release all necessary forms that will be required for you to fill out and also all other necessary documents.

If you are OK with all these proceeds and wish to continue, or if you wish not to continue, please do inform me. I have to get all these documents ready, meet with the respective attorneys and also make the trip to Sri Lanka soon, so I need to know.

I request strict confidentiality from you on this matter and I will be very humbly obliged if you did not provide any information on this deal to anyone.

Kindly respond with 24 to 36 hours if you are interested in proceeding or not. If I do not get a response from you by then, I will cease from contacting you again.

Best regards,

Adrian

The website mentioned by Mr Muster is the official website for the Claims Resolution Tribunal of the Holocaust Victim Assets Litigation against Swiss Banks and other Swiss Entities, which is responsible for processing claims relating to assets deposited in Swiss banks by victims of Nazi persecution prior to and during the Second World War. It therefore has nothing whatsoever to do with recently-deceased Yugoslavian oil traders.

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Please reassure me on one point

Sent: Wed, 11 May 2005 16:25:07

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your prompt response to my email, and for sending me the further information that I requested regarding your proposal.

Now that I know how much money we are talking about, I can confirm that I am definitely interested in pursuing this matter further: I calculate that the 5% you are offering me will work out at more than $4 million, which is more than enough to fund the expansion of my business that I am currently planning.

However, before we go any further, I would appreciate it if you could reassure me on one point: is this all legal and above-board? You mentioned that the late Mr de Balint's son is currently serving time in jail for drug trafficking offences. This money doesn't have any connection with drugs, does it? I ask because I am surprised that a simple oil trader has managed to accumulate such immense wealth via legal means.

I trust that you can appreciate the reason for my concern: I may only run a small business, but I am well-respected in my community and I have my reputation to consider. The last thing I want to do is to get mixed up in anything illegal, especially if drug money is involved.

If you are able to reassure me on this one point, Mr Muster, I will be happy to move forward with your business proposal.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: Please reassure me on one point

Sent: Thu, 12 May 2005 04:11:14 -0400

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I am very glad that you would like to help with the claim of the assets of Mr de Balint.

As you have calculated, the share of the money I offer for your help will run up to about $4.1 million (US currency).

Also, you have asked if Mr de Balint's assets were gotten illegally or from drugs. The answer is no! Mr de Balint's oil trading activities were very separate from his son's dealings.

I guess you know these days that most young individuals are into drugs; both its usage and marketing. You would notice that most children from wealthy families have such tendencies. Mr de Balint's son never had any access to his father's accounts and he never made any deposits there to infer that his father was involved in any of his dealings.

All of Mr de Balint's assets (at least those I know of that are held in Switzerland), were obtained from oil trade and also time deposit investments on the profits from his trades.

I was his Investment Portfolio Manager for a few years at the Zurich branch of the bank and I have never seen any suspicious movements or deposits of funds.

I know you are concerned about your reputation, but my friend, think about what difference your share of this money can make for both your reputation and your business.

What line of business are you into anyway?

I hope we can proceed with the proposal and start processing the claim of the assets. There is a lot of work that needs to be done.

As soon as I get confirmation/consent from you, I will make meetings with some attorneys I see best to handle the case, so I can discuss the case with them and find out how much they want to be paid for the job.

Kindly respond within 36 to 48 hours and let me know what you would like to do.

Respectfully,

Adrian M

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Thank you for your reassurance

Sent: Thu, 12 May 2005 14:05:58

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for reassuring me on the matter of the legality of the business transaction you are proposing. I am extremely relieved to hear that there is nothing untoward about this transaction, and that the late Mr de Balint's fortune has no link whatsoever to the drugs trade.

On the subject of drugs, I must admit that I do feel somewhat uncomfortable with the idea that in going ahead with this transaction, I will be aiding and abetting a convicted drugs smuggler. I am of course referring to Mr de Balint's wayward son. If I understand things correctly, the young Mr de Balint stands to do very well indeed out of this transaction. In fact, once he is released from prison, he will be rich beyond the wildest dreams of most men. This seems wrong to me, somehow. I cannot help but feel that if I move forward with this transaction, I will be condoning the evil acts that Mr de Balint Jnr has committed. Surely your conscience must be pricking you in a similar manner, Mr Muster?

Even though Mr de Balint Jnr is serving a long sentence for his crimes, a mere twenty-five years' imprisonment is not nearly punishment enough, if you ask me. Drugs are the bane of modern society, and in my opinion, convicted drugs smugglers should have their testicles cut off and their eyes put out, after which they should be imprisoned for the rest of their miserable little lives on a desolate, swampy, mosquito-infested island. That would teach them a lesson. I am sure you would agree, Mr Muster.

Anyway, back to this transaction. Now that you have convinced me that there is nothing untoward about this business, I am happy to move forward. What is our next step?

Incidentally, Mr Muster, you asked what line of business I am in. I own and run the Gilbert Murray Introduction Agency, a regional concern with over 600 clients on our books. I live in a very remote, rural area of the United Kingdom, and a large proportion of the population around here lives in relative isolation, in small cottages, farms and hamlets, which can make it rather difficult when it comes to finding the ideal partner. The Gilbert Murray Introduction Agency has an excellent record in matching and bringing together like-minded people, for friendship, companionship and romance. We pride ourselves on our service, our professionalism, our confidentiality and our integrity. Much like you Swiss bankers, no doubt.

I have been running the agency for the past fifteen years, and I am now keen to expand beyond the immediate area and turn it into a national agency. Obviously, this will cost a considerable amount of money, and this is why your business proposal caught my eye the other day.

I must go now: I have to interview a prospective new client. Please get back to me as soon as you can with details of our next step.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: Thank you for your reassurance

Sent: Fri, 13 May 2005 08:11:31 -0400

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I understand how you feel about people who deal in drugs and I think they are the ones that bring ruin to our society.

But there is one thing I want you to be convinced about. We are not claiming this money for reasons that are morally degrading. If the funds in question belong to Mr de Balint Jnr and we knew the money was gotten from drugs, then we will be committing an offence that I think our conscience will not let pass. The funds belong to the father and I am sure we would both know that the son deserves more than he is getting.

Well anyway, I think we both stand a chance to gain more from this than the son would imagine. He (the son) is used to his father's immense wealth and getting this money in his hands does not change any fact to him. He will still be able to get it one time or the other when he gets out. All he has to do is to appoint some financial managers to take care of the money till he gets out.

Although it will not be the best of ideas (as there is the tendency for the advisers to mismanage the assets), but I am sure he would do it if that is what it takes to keep his father's assets.

My idea is "let us be his financial advisors till he has the chance to have this money for himself".

The funds will still be in my possession after the claim for a period of years and I am thinking about also investing it, and when the time is right for Mr de Balint Jnr to claim his money from me, I will deduct my share and also the profits on top of it all. It's something I have had time to think about and I am sure it is the best retirement plan anyone could ask for.

What you would need to do to proceed is to click on the link below:

www.mail.yahoo.com

Log onto the following Yahoo email account with the following details:

Username: adrian_muster45

Password: player81

There are two emails in the inbox with some attached files.

Download these attached files in both case, ie forms and sample forms, and print them out and fill out the original forms according to the sample forms provided. After you have done this, please notify me.

I will be meeting with some attorneys on Monday to discuss with them and I will let you know how much they want us to pay for their services.

I will keep in touch. Please do the same and let me know when you have the forms.

Best regards,

Adrian

Page 1 of the scammer's form

Page 2 of the scammer's form

Page 3 of the scammer's form

Page 1 of the scammer's sample form

Page 2 of the scammer's sample form

Page 3 of the scammer's sample form

Fortunately for Gilbert - and unfortunately for Mr Muster - the password he has given Gilbert turns out to be the same one he uses to access his scamming account, so Gilbert now has full access to this scammer's email account. So, it's time to play. To start off with, Gilbert has added an automatic signature to Mr Muster's email preferences. This signature, which will be added to all of Mr Muster's future emails, reads "PS. I am ashamed to say that I have an extremely small penis". Let's see how long it is before Mr Muster notices this... and whether he knows how to turn it off.

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I will cast my eyes over these documents this weekend

Sent: Fri, 13 May 2005 14:38:37

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email, and for informing me of the location of the documents I need to complete. I am rather busy this weekend with work, but I will cast my eyes over the documents this weekend and get back to you next week.

I must admit, I am still rather unsure as to how I feel about the moral side of this transaction. After all is said and done, the evil Mr de Balint Jnr will still end up with millions of dollars in his hands, and that will be partly thanks to us. As a drug smuggler, Mr de Balint Jnr should be castrated, blinded and exiled to a remote island with no hope of release, not handed millions of dollars on a plate. I shall wrestle with my conscience over the weekend and see if I can justify this in my own mind.

I trust you will have a pleasant weekend. Tell me, Mr Muster, do you have anything nice planned for Saturday and Sunday?

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I will cast my eyes over these documents this weekend

Sent: Sat, 14 May 2005 16:41:16 -0400

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I have to say that I do not think that Mr de Balint Jnr should be treated as royalty for what he has done, but I guess we have to overlook some facts and make it work in our favour.

I hope you can get the forms soon and have a look at them and I will proceed to give further instructions.

I have met with some attorneys and I have discussed with them with regards to representing us with regards to the claim of the assets. The claims process should take about two to three weeks and they will be required to work full time. They are asking for full payment upfront and they ask to be paid 2,850 Euros for the full time services.

Will you be able to handle 50% payment of these fees and I will handle the rest? Let me know how much you can afford.

I also still have other documents that you will require to attach to the claim forms while sending them to the bank.

I don't have anything planned for this weekend and all I can do right now is to keep making plans and also making plans for the week to come.

I will wait on your response with regards to the forms when you are less busy.

Thank you for all the support on this and I hope we will be able to make some progress next week. I will keep in touch, kindly do the same.

Regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: These forms are in some foreign language

Sent: Mon, 16 May 2005 10:18:21

Dear Mr Muster,

I trust that you enjoyed your weekend, my dear fellow. I spent this weekend wrestling with my conscience over the somewhat dubious morality of this situation. After much consideration, I can tell you that I am prepared to move forward with this transaction, but only on the strict understanding that I will not have to come into contact with the felonious Mr de Balint Jnr.

I cannot abide criminal types, and if I were to meet Mr de Balint Jnr in person, I am afraid that I would not be able to stop myself from telling him to his face that in my opinion, his gonads should be removed with a blunt knife, his eyes should be plucked from his face with a dirty spoon, and he should be forced to spend the rest of his miserable existence on a disease-infested island in the middle of nowhere.

I am sure that this would not do much to aid the smooth progress of this transaction, so I would like you to reassure me that I shall not have to be in contact with Mr de Balint Jnr at any stage in this business. Once I have this reassurance, I will be happy to move forward.

Now then, those forms you told me about. I downloaded the forms this weekend, but I'm afraid I'm having some difficulty understanding them: they appear to be in German or some other foreign language.

Languages have never been my forte, Mr Muster. Do you have any English forms that I could fill in?

Incidentally, as you are doing me a favour, I was wondering if I could do you one in return, Mr Muster. You have not told me your marital status, but by the way you express yourself in your emails, I am assuming that you are single. As a token of my gratitude towards you for introducing me to this great opportunity, I would like to offer you free membership of my introduction agency.

What do you say, Mr Muster? I always say that the perfect woman is out there somewhere. With the help of my agency, you may well be able to find her. We have a large number of eligible women on our books at the moment. One of them could be your ideal partner.

Do let me know about the forms as soon as you can, and whether you would be interested in the free membership to my agency that I am offering you. I look forward to hearing from you by return.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: These forms are in some foreign language

Sent: Mon, 16 May 2005 14:34:01 +0200

Dear Lady Agatha,

Thank you for the email and comment.

I have noticed this most embarrassing postscript on my email account. I think it is probably a practical joke from one of these ridiculous spam emails that are sent to my email address daily.

I have changed my email address to admu@safe-mail.net for communication security reasons. Please do kindly send me emails through this address only. Thank you for understanding.

I hope you can overlook this and we could proceed with our business.

The forms which I sent over are in German and they are in the local language spoken in most of Switzerland. The forms are not currently available in any other languages and this is one of the reasons why I attached a sample of what the completed forms should look like, so you will know the areas to fill out and what to fill out there.

I want you to fill out your details and mark the appropriate areas on the originals as I have done for the example of "J. Smith". It's really quite simple.

Let me know if you can get this done, or you need further assistance.

On the other hand, you will not be coming into contact with Mr de Balint Jnr in person. All meetings with Mr de Balint Jnr will be between him and the attorneys and not you in person. I assure you of this.

I understand the way you feel about things, but as I said earlier; you might have to push aside any personal feelings so we can see this deal through and also for the benefit of both of us.

I am not married (actually divorced) and I don't know if I will like to get married again. Anyway, I accept the membership to your introductory "dating" agency. As you said, no one knows what could happen.

Do give me a feedback with regards to the forms soon, as we still have other documents that I will like you to look through before the forms are sent back to the bank.

Thank you for the email and I hope to hear from you soon.

Do have a nice day.

Best regards,

Adrian

Mr Muster may have changed his email account, but luckily he has been foolish enough to use the same password, so Gilbert has full access to his new account too. "Lady Agatha" (another scambuster who is toying with Mr Muster at the same time as Gilbert) has obviously received an email which included Mr Muster's embarrassing automatic signature. The scammer seems to be getting rather confused by it all: he is now addressing emails to the wrong people.

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Who is "Lady Agatha"?

Sent: Mon, 16 May 2005 14:06:36

Dear Mr Muster,

I have to say, my dear fellow, I was greatly confused by your last email. Firstly, what is this "most embarrassing postscript" to which you referred? And secondly, who is this "Lady Agatha" to whom you addressed your last email to me?

Have you got me confused with someone else, Mr Muster? Please explain what is going on. I thought this business was entirely between you and I. In fact to quote you, you told me last week that you "request strict confidentiality from you (me) on this matter and I (you) will be very humbly obliged if you (I) did not provide any information on this deal to anyone". But now you are addressing me as someone else entirely.

What is going on, Mr Muster? You haven't involved someone else in this business without telling me, have you? Who is this shady "Lady Agatha" character?

I expect an explanation from you immediately, Mr Muster. I have already told you that my reputation is extremely important to me, so confidentiality in this matter is as important to me as it is to you.

Kindly get back to me at once.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: Who is "Lady Agatha"?

Sent: Mon, 16 May 2005 15:21:21 -0400

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I am sorry about addressing you as "Lady Agatha".

Lady Agatha is helping me out with regards to the strange virus that has recently infected my computer and emails. I have to scan all my emails before I send them. I emailed her just before I emailed you.

I know that you are concerned about your reputation. So am I. This is why I have to be extra careful with this virus that has infected my computer.

I hope there is no offence taken. I only copied some extract from the email I sent her with regards to informing you of the virus, but I did not know that I copied her name with that section of the email also.

This is the first and last time it will happen. I have to be on my toes, as I think someone is trying to spy on me and extracting information from my computer.

There is a "read request" attached with this email. Kindly acknowledge it for security reasons.

I hope we can proceed as planned soon. Do you have all the forms and have you completed them as instructed?

Let me know and we can move on to the next phase. I sincerely apologise for the mistake in identity.

Respectfully,

Adrian M

Thanks to the automatic signature that Gilbert added to Mr Muster's old email account, Mr Muster now thinks that his computer is infected with a virus. To increase his paranoia, Gilbert has now added the same offensive automatic signature to Mr Muster's new email account.

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I hope you haven't passed this virus on to my computer

Sent: Tue, 17 May 2005 09:09:41

Dear Mr Muster,

I have just read your latest email. To be quite frank, Mr Muster, I found it quite disturbing. You didn't tell me that your computer was infected with some kind of virus. I hope you haven't passed this virus on to my computer, Mr Muster. That would be terribly inconvenient: all the records for my introduction agency are stored on this computer, so a virus on the machine could be devastating to my business.

I am very worried about this, Mr Muster. Tell me, what effect is the virus having on your computer? You must tell me at once so that I can check to see if my own computer is similarly affected. This is not good news. Not good news at all.

And now, on top of this, you are telling me that you think someone is spying on you and extracting information from your computer! How can this be? Do you think someone else has found out about our little business deal? Have you mentioned it to someone else? How else can your no doubt tight security have been breached?

When sensitive, business-critical information like this is at stake, this kind of carry on will not do at all. It is extremely worrying.

Now then, Mr Muster, regarding those forms. I am still having trouble working out how to fill them in. If only they were in English, it would be so much easier. I would very much appreciate your help in filling them in. If you could advise me exactly what to write where, that would be a big help. I know how important legal documents like these can be, so I am keen not to make any mistakes.

Also on the subject of forms, now that you have accepted my offer of free membership to my introduction agency, I have attached the initial questionnaire for you to fill in. The form is quite self-explanatory - unlike those German forms you are expecting me to complete - so it shouldn't take you more than a few minutes to fill in the form.

Please follow the instructions on the form precisely. The questions have been carefully designed to give us an initial idea of the sort of person you are looking for. With so many people on my agency's books, your answers will enable us to identify the people with whom you will be most compatible. Once we have established that, we can start to narrow down the list of potential partners further.

Please print out and fill in the form, then scan it in and send it back to me as soon as you can. I can then enter your preferences into my computer and begin the process of finding you your perfect match.

I look forward to receiving the completed form by return, along with some advice on how to fill in those German forms you sent me.

Also, I must insist that you get back to me immediately with details of what that virus is doing to your computer, so that I can check whether my own computer is infected too. Perhaps you should consider purchasing some up to date virus-scanning software, Mr Muster.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

An introduction agency questionnaire, with ridiculous questions

Gilbert's introduction agency questionnaire

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Email was received

Sent: Tue, 17 May 2005 16:50:01 +0200

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I would like you to know that I have quarantined the virus on my computer and I have had time to retrieve most of my files which I thought were lost. The only thing this type of virus does is to extract data from your computer and transmit it to the computer that issued the virus.

Mr Murray, I have to tell you that I scanned all files including emails before I sent them off my computer. Not to worry, your ISP will inform you if this virus gets on your computer as they will notice it.

If you would be sending responses to me via email, I suggest you use the following email address for both our interests:

adrian_muster2002@yahoo.com

I have to tell you that being a Swiss banker, I suspect any little virus attack on my computer as very threatening and also very dangerous, as someone might be trying to get the information which I stored about my clients on my computer out of it and use it to commit identity theft, which could lead to an instance whereby the perpetrators will try and transfer funds from the clients' account.

It has never happened to me while I was working for the bank, but I have heard stories. Not to worry, I have not stored any information about you on my computer.

Mr Murray, it seems that you get worried easily. I had noticed this from the onset of communications with you. I will like you to please be more relaxed. I know you are worried about your reputation, but I am worried about mine too.

About the forms, it's quite simple. Do you have the sample forms? If you do, just fill out the originals as the samples were filled out. I would have hoped to get the forms in English, but for now this is not possible. We will just have to make do with this one.

On the first page (ie sample form 1), mark "Herr" (meaning Mr), then fill in your name and surname and date of birth. On the line below that comes your full residential address and phone number. Where I marked "USA", you should mark your current country of residence. On line 4, you mark the "X"'s where I have marked them. Make sure you don't mark an "X" on anywhere else other than where specified, or the forms will be voided by the bank.

On the second form (with reference to sample form 2), on the row labelled "6" all you do is to mark an "X" and exactly where it has been done and write "USD" beside it. This is to inform the bank that you would like to claim the funds in US dollars.

On the third form, you mark an "X" on yellownet, on the row labelled "12", and under this, you date and sign the form.

The rest of the spaces that were left behind are meant for official use at the bank, so please do not fill out any more than I have told you to.

If you would be sending responses to me via email, I suggest you use the following email address for both our interests:

adrian_muster2002@yahoo.com

Let me know if you have been able to fill out the forms as I have specified. I still have some other documents that you will be required to fill out, attach and send to the bank with the claim forms.

Also, with regards to the questionnaire you attached to the email, I will take a look at it and fill it out soon. But right now, I think it will be business before pleasure.

Kindly get back to me soon.

Regards,

Adrian

Mr Muster has now opened a third email account in an attempt to shake off the "virus" he thinks has infected his computer. Unfortunately, he has had the good sense to use a different password for this new account, so Gilbert cannot access it. However, Gilbert has helpfully closed down Mr Muster's two old email accounts for him. Let's see if we can make him believe that there are problems with this new email account too...

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Will you please stop changing your email address?

Sent: Tue, 17 May 2005 16:52:57

Dear Mr Muster,

I have just received your latest email. Will you please stop changing your email address? I am beginning to lose count of the number of email addresses you have had over the past few days, and I am starting to get extremely confused about which one I should use when emailing you. For example, your last email came from one address, yet you advised me to reply to a completely different one. What on earth is going on over there?

Thank you for your reassurance about this virus that has infected your computer. You ought to be more careful with things like that, my dear fellow, especially when you are dealing with sensitive information.

Regarding these forms, thank you for the additional information. I will take a look at them tonight and see if I can make sense of them.

I am glad to hear that you received the questionnaire safely. Between you and I, Mr Muster, the sooner you can fill it in, the better: I have just enrolled a couple of new female members to the introduction agency today, and I can tell you that they are a pair of absolute stunners. The sooner I get your initial questionnaire back to me, the sooner I will be able to run your details through the computer and see if you match up with either of these new members. I really shouldn't say this, but seeing as you are doing me such a big favour, I may be able to "tweak" the results a little to ensure that your details match up. Get the form back to me in the next couple of days and I will see what I can do before someone else snaps them up.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

PS. I was rather bemused by the postscript you added to the end of your last email, in which you apologised for the modest size of your genitalia. I know that you are enrolling in my introduction agency, but to be frank Mr Muster, this really is more information than I need - or want - to know at this stage. This level of detail isn't normally required unless one of your potential partners requests it specifically. Kindly act with a touch more decorum, my dear fellow.

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re : Will you please stop changing your email address

Sent: Tue, 17 May 2005 21:04:02 +0200

NOTE: THERE ARE FILES ATTACHED WITH THIS EMAIL. KINDLY DOWNLOAD AND PRINT OUT.

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I am sorry that I have to change email addresses so frequently, but it is to make sure that our communication remains secure.

Using only one email address to transmit all emails is not very safe, especially with the documents which I have to send over to you by email.

Mr Murray, I will like you to take a look at the forms as soon as you can, as I would like us to proceed to a considerable extent before the end of this week.

As of the moment, the most important issue we have to face right now is claiming these assets at the bank. After the claim process, you can register a new bank account in your country, or you can apply to open an account here in Switzerland, to avoid suspicion and also all taxes that might follow if your share is transferred to your country. Taxation in Switzerland are the lowest you can find anywhere.

I have attached a copy of Mr de Balint's original death certificate. Please print these out. All the completed forms should be sent back to the bank directly at the following address:

Banca Unione di Credito, Piazza Dante 7, PO Box 2861, CH 6901 Lugano, Schweiz, Switzerland

I will attach and send to you a power of attorney form, which you will have to fill accordingly and send back to the bank with the completed claim forms and the death certificate. I will give you the name of the law firm that I have met with to represent "us" later tomorrow after I have finalised meetings with them.

Kindly also make a copy of your passport or driver's licence and include it with the completed forms and power of attorney when sending back to the bank.

The lawyers will handle everything on your behalf with the bank and I will provide them with all necessary documents that they might require on the deceased, or that the bank might request. Let me know if you have any comments.

Keep in touch regularly.

Regards,

Adrian Muster

NOTE: THERE ARE FILES ATTACHED WITH THIS EMAIL. KINDLY DOWNLOAD AND PRINT OUT.

The blank power of attorney

The first page of an indecipherable certificate

The second page of an indecipherable certificate

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: You're confusing me now

Sent: Wed, 18 May 2005 12:33:39

Dear Mr Muster,

I have to say, Mr Muster, you're starting to confuse me with all these documents you keep sending me. I'm beginning to feel a little overwhelmed by it all. After all, I am but a simple country introduction agency proprietor.

Why have you sent me a blank power of attorney? And what is that other document all about? I can't make that out at all.

I suggest that to avoid any further confusion, we deal with these documents one at a time. Let us start with that three-page German document you sent me last week.

I have re-examined the document in light of the advice you gave me yesterday, and I am now fairly sure that I will be able to fill in the document accurately. However, as the document is in German and I know slightly less German than I know Serbo-Croat, I don't actually know what it is that you want me to sign.

Welsby, the lawyer I have used for the past ten years or more, has always advised me never to sign anything unless I am absolutely sure that I know what I am signing. I could be signing up for anything by putting my name to this document: for all I know, I could be agreeing to sign over my life savings to someone, or to hand over my first-born son into slavery.

Admittedly, these are somewhat extreme examples, but I presume that you get my point. You do hear of things like this happening, and I always feel that it is better to be safe than to be sorry. With this in mind, I cannot sign this document until I know exactly what it says. Therefore, I would appreciate it if you could provide me with a line-by-line translation of the document, for my peace of mind. As you obviously have some considerable skill at languages, I presume this will not be too much trouble for you.

As soon as I receive the translation from you, I will be happy to sign the document, and then we can move forward.

As you are keen as I am to move forward with this transaction, I look forward to receiving the translation from you later today.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: You're confusing me now

Sent: Wed, 18 May 2005 16:39:57 +0100 (BST)

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I would like you to kindly understand that this matter is not as complicated as you put it.

I think I understand the problem, but I would like you to know that there must be trust between the two of us. If I did not trust you, I would not have contacted you or even have gone this far with you in this proposal. Mr Murray, you have to learn how to trust my word from this moment onwards.

For one, I know you obviously trust me to an extent, or else we would not have gotten to this stage. I am sure you are as eager to close this deal as I am. I know that you are concerned about your reputation and your security. I am also concerned about mine too.

Well, with regards to the claim forms, form 1:

The first section, labelled "Konto/Depotinheber", is asking for the personal information about the claimant to the account.

The fourth section, labelled "Korrespondenzadresse", requests if the address stated in the first line is your permanent address or temporary. As you will notice, I marked permanent address with the "X". The other "X" on that same line, which as you can see is marked on the box for "E", states that your primary language is English. The bank will transmit all further correspondences to you (if necessary) in English.

On the second page of the claim form, you can see the section marked "6 Angabenzur Eroffnung Gelbes Konto". This section requests that you fill in the currency of the account on which the claim is made. This is the only thing you fill out on this page. The other sections will be completed by the bank officials during the claim of the assets.

On the third form, the section "12 Weitere Zusatzdienstleistungen" is requesting if you would like the bank to appoint an attorney on your behalf. You are to put an "X" on yellownet, which means no, as you will be appointing your own attorneys.

This is where the blank power of attorney form which I sent over to you yesterday comes in. If you read through the power of attorney form, you will notice that you will be requested to fill in your name and also the name of the deceased account holder and also the name of the attorneys that will be representing you in the claim.

The other two documents I sent over are the copies of the original death certificate of Mr John de Balint.

All the completed forms and the completed power of attorney, and also printed copies of the death certificate, have to be sent back to the bank for processing. I hope you saved the bank address which I included in the email which I sent yesterday? Please do save it: it would be of reference later on while sending the forms back.

One thing I will like you to note from this point on is that you have to trust my word if we are going to get the transaction done successfully.

I am sure if you really believed that I would be trying to steal your money or "sell your first born into slavery", you would not have replied to my email.

I have concluded with the attorneys that I have selected to represent the case (claim) with the bank. They are asking for 2,850 Euros for the job. Can you pay the whole 2,850 Euros, or shall we split the fees 50% both ways and I pay 50% and you handle 50%? The reason why I ask is that I am a little short of cash and it might take me some time to get that type of cash on short demand.

As I told you in one of my previous emails, I had to give Mr de Balint Jnr $100,000 (guarantee) to get these attorneys to release the original death certificate to me, so we could use it to claim his father's assets. So you could say that I have put in my life savings into this. That is why I want us to move on with it as quickly as possible.

I hope I have answered all unclear areas. Kindly get back to me soon.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Thank you for the explanation

Sent: Wed, 18 May 2005 17:25:50

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email, and for your explanation regarding the German form you sent me. I am not quite sure that you needed to send me five different copies of the same email, but no doubt this is just an example of your thoroughness and diligence.

First of all, I would like to put your mind at rest over something. If I have given the impression that I don't trust you, I must apologise profusely, as this is not the case at all. Of course I trust you, Mr Muster: after all, you Swiss bankers are renowned across the world for your trustworthiness and integrity. I wasn't for one moment suggesting that I thought you might be asking me to sign away my life savings or sell my first-born son into slavery. I was simply sticking to the advice that my lawyer, Welsby, gave me many years ago: never to sign anything without understanding it completely beforehand. Welsby's advice has always stood me in good stead, so I trust that you can appreciate the reason for my concerns.

Now that we have got that out of the way, I would like to turn to your explanation of the German form. While you have explained sections 1, 4, 6 and 12 (the sections I have to fill in) with admirable clarity, you have not explained the remaining sections of the form to me (2, 3, 5, 7, 8, 9, 10 and 11, ie the sections I do not have to fill in). Nor have you provided me with a translation of the two paragraphs that appear just above where I have to sign and date the form on the third page.

You have told me that these remaining sections "will be completed by the bank officials during the claim of the assets". Seeing as my name will appear at the bottom of the form, I am keen to know precisely what these remaining sections will be used for.

Please therefore send me an explanation of these sections by return, along with a word-for-word translation of the two paragraphs immediately above the place where I sign and date the form. Once I have this information, I will be more than happy to proceed.

Regarding the death certificate you sent me, not only is this in a foreign language, but I can't even make out the name of the deceased anywhere on the form. If I can't pick his name out, what chance have the people at the bank got? I would appreciate it if you could point out where Mr de Balint's name appears on the death certificate so that I can be satisfied in my own mind.

I must thank you for putting up with me and my concerns, Mr Muster. I know I can be a bit of a worrier at times, but I have always found that a little caution pays dividends in the end. Just like the Co-op used to do.

On the subject of forms, I note that you haven't yet returned the questionnaire I sent you. It won't take you more than a few moments to fill it in, so please do get it back to me as soon as you can, Mr Muster. I am keen to repay your kindness and consideration in this matter by doing all that I can to find you the ideal partner, but until you send that form back to me, I can't make a start on that.

I look forward to hearing back from you with answers to my remaining queries - and with the completed questionnaire attached - either later today or early tomorrow.

Do have a pleasant evening, my dear fellow.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I am disappointed not to have heard back from you yet

Sent: Thu, 19 May 2005 16:02:15

Dear Mr Muster,

I am disappointed not to have heard back from you yet, with an explanation of the remaining sections of that German form you sent me. I am keen to move forward with this transaction as speedily as possible. We have wasted a considerable amount of time thanks to that virus your computer contracted, and I am keen to press on and make this time up as much as possible.

Perhaps you do not quite appreciate the reason for my concern over this German document. Let me put it to you another way. Although you are obviously an educated man, it is a fairly safe assumption that you do not speak Cantonese. Put yourself in my shoes, Mr Muster: if someone was to hand you a form in Cantonese and ask you to sign it without first explaining precisely what the form said, would you be willing to sign it? I doubt it very much.

Let us waste no more time, Mr Muster. Let us press on with this business without delay. Send me the information I require by return so that we can move forward.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I am disappointed not to have heard back from you yet

Sent: Thu, 19 May 2005 17:51:00 +0100 (BST)

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I am very sorry that I have not been able to get in touch with you for the past few hours, but I have been a bit under the weather. I have been trying to recuperate and I just had enough sleep to help me through today. I have not been on my computer since yesterday.

I will brief you on the sections of the claim form which I left out during the interpretation on the other sections which you will be required to fill out. The sections I left out are those that will be for official use at the bank. I have put together the relevant interpretations and the reasons why the bank will be filling out these sections.

Please read:

"2 Agaben des Partners": this section is meant for the information about your partner (ie wife or spouse) in the case that this is a joint claim. Kindly leave it blank. The bank will cancel this section out (if left blank), on reviewing the form.

"3 Der Gasetzliche Vertreter": in this section, you are meant to state the name and surname of the attorney that will be representing you. But as I just concluded meetings with the attorneys yesterday, I am yet to compile this information and send it over to you for this section and also for filling out the power of attorney. I will send it over later today.

"5 Bestehendes Konto bei Post Finance": this will be for use at the bank. The bank will fill in the account number of the account being claimed and the account holder's name and surname. Obviously, you don't know the account number of the deceased, so you cannot fill this in.

"7 Karten zum Gelben Konto": here the bank will provide more information in case the deceased had more than one account at the bank at the time of his death. In our case, three more account numbers will be filled in here, as I told you from the start that Mr de Balint held four accounts at the bank.

"8 Uberzugslimiten beim Gelben Konto": in this section, the bank will most likely put an "X" on the CHF 1000. What this section is asking is how much is the total assets at the bank that is being claimed. "CHF 1000" means the assets are over one million Swiss Francs. As you know, I gave you a rough idea of Mr de Balint's net assets to be $80.25 million (US currency); it might be more than this at the bank.

"9 Angaben zur Eroffnung Gelbes Deposito-Konto": here the bank will be confirming your identity as stated on the form and they will do this by perhaps contacting Mr de Balint Jnr for confirmation. Also they will be confirming your attorney's identity and after this has been done, they will fill in both your name and the attorney's name in the first two lines. Afterwards, the forms will be stamped approved.

"11 Angaben zur Eroffnung eines Depots": as before, all accounts which are present and under claim will be verified by the bank, to belong to Mr de Balint. Only account numbers will be stated, as in the bank's records before the accounts were deemed dormant. This section will also be stamped approved, after they have been verified.

"12 Weitere Zusatzdienstleistugen": this section is not relevant to the claim. It is only relevant if we were to be placing a claim on an account which is in investments and the investments had not matured before the claim was placed on the account.

I have interpreted this to the best of my abilities.

I will also be sending over the details for filling out of "3 Der Gasetzliche Vertreter" on the German claim form and also for the power of attorney.

I will get back in touch with you later tonight if possible. I will like to rest a bit now, to avoid a breakdown of my body system.

Thank you for the email. I will be in touch soon.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Attorney Details

Sent: Thu, 19 May 2005 20:21:19 +0100 (BST)

Dear friend Murray,

I have the information for the power of attorney form, as the attorneys have agreed to take on the job.

Details for filling out the power of attorney form:

Name of firm (representative): INSAD SA (Craig E Ihde)

Firm's address: Schifflaende 12, 8010 Zurich, Switzerland

Name of account owner claimed: John de Balint

You will also be filling in the name "Craig Ihde" into the section "3 Der Gasetzliche Vertreter" of the claim form.

I think you can do these and I will get back to you tomorrow with further instructions and details.

Keep in touch.

Regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Thank you for your detailed explanation

Sent: Fri, 20 May 2005 12:02:43

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your emails, and for your detailed explanation regarding the remaining sections of the German claim form. The information you have provided has certainly helped to put my mind at rest.

However, I note that you have not yet provided me with an explanation of section 10 of the form ("Zusatzdienstleistungen zum Geben Deposito-Konto"), and that you have not yet provided me with a translation of the two short paragraphs that appear just above the place where I sign and date the form. I can only assume that this has been an oversight on your part, possibly caused by your current ill health (I do sincerely hope that you are feeling better now, by the way).

Please send me an explanation of section 10 and a translation of the two paragraphs in question by return, so that I can fill in the form.

I also raised an issue about the death certificate a few days ago. If you remember, I mentioned that no matter how hard I looked, I could not see Mr de Balint's name anywhere on the form. Upon closer inspection, I have just been able to make out three dates on the form: 13 February 1832, 8 May 1852 and 21 October 1858.

Considering that Mr de Balint died only recently, are you sure you have sent me the correct document, Mr Muster? I can only assume that you have sent me the wrong document by mistake, as this doesn't look anything like a recent death certificate to me. Please check your records carefully and send me the correct document by return.

How is your health today, Mr Muster? I do hope that you haven't contracted that virus that was afflicting your computer. If you ask me, what you need is a good woman to look after you while you are ill. Take my advice, my dear fellow: raise yourself up from your sick bed, fill in that questionnaire I sent you and send it back to me straight away. I will then do all I can to find you the perfect partner, who will look after you for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, etc.

Do get back to me as soon as you can with the remaining information about the claim form and a copy Mr de Balint's death certificate. I look forward to hearing from you.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: Thank you for your detailed explanation

Sent: Fri, 20 May 2005 13:32:05 +0100 (BST)

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

You are a very inquisitive man and this intrigues me about you. I guess it comes with the business. In your line of business, I guess you have to do a lot of question asking and I understand.

Please don't be offended by these words, but as you know I am not at the peak of my health. With regards to the questionnaire, I will fill it out and send it over when I am ready to meet someone, but at this point I am not really keen on starting anything with anyone. I understand your position in trying to help me find a suited partner, but I have to say that I guess I will like to be a bit spontaneous and I will like you to match my profile to anyone suitable and not anyone you think that I will like. Things always work better like that.

Back to business, I am sorry if I omitted any translations, but I guess I must have overlooked it.

The translation to section 10 of the form ("Zusatzdienstleistungen zum Geben Deposito-Konto") is not really different from that of section 9. All the bank will be doing here is to repeat the steps taken in section 9, but here is where the approval and certifications of your identity and that of the attorney's will be confirmed officially. As you will see in the forms, there are some small boxes on the bottom right hand corner. The bank will display all approvals here with the signature and stamp of an official at the bank, or maybe the bank seal will be imprinted here.

The two paragraphs above the signature line state that "The bank has the right to cancel any claim at the initial stages of the claim, if the bank is not satisfied that the claimant has met all requirements/filled out all relevant information required by the bank to process the claim on the account in question. If you are in agreement with this term, kindly indicate with your signature and date this form.".

With regards to the document confirming the death of Mr de Balint, the document you have with you could be likened to what you call an official police report in your country.

As you know, Mr de Balint did not die in Switzerland and he was neither buried here either. He was buried in his home country, Yugoslavia.

This report was made for confirmation by the police who actually undertook an investigation to certify this. These dates, 13 February 1832, 8 May 1852 and 21 October 1858, are the dates when this document was passed into law in Switzerland at various cantons (states), ie Zurich, Geneva and Lugano.

This documentation is valid in these three cantons and we have a copy for certification purposes with the bank. This document was issued before the bank actually received a copy of Mr de Balint's real death certificate, and I think the bank should have a copy of this too.

I hope this time I have answered all questions?!

Let me know if you got the information with regards to the power of attorney in the email I sent yesterday night.

As you said, we have wasted enough time. I hope we can proceed with this soon. I hope all the forms can be completed and mailed back to the bank next week and I also hope that we can issue the attorneys their fees by next week, so they too can start their work.

I hope to hear from you soon. I am going to bed. Thank you for the email.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I am now happy with the German claim form

Sent: Fri, 20 May 2005 14:32:29

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email, and for answering my two remaining queries regarding the German claim form. I am now more than happy to fill out the form as you have directed, and to sign my name at the bottom of it.

You mentioned that you thought I was a very inquisitive man. I suppose I am rather meticulous. The devil is in the detail, as they say. I like to be sure that I know what I am doing, rather than simply jump in at the deep end without thinking, as so many people seem to do nowadays. I must thank you for putting up with my punctiliousness, especially at a time when your health is not at its best.

Now then, regarding that document you sent me which you say confirms the death of Mr de Balint. I'm sorry, Mr Muster, but I am absolutely sure that you have sent me the wrong form. I showed the form to my son, Gilbert Jnr, this lunchtime, who has just started learning French in school and therefore has a very basic understanding of the language.

According to Gilbert Jnr, this form looks more like some kind of passport - and a very old passport at that. Apparently it talks about giving the bearer of the document "help and protection", and requests that the bearer of the certificate should be allowed to "pass and repass freely". I am sure you will agree, Mr Muster, it doesn't sound as if the certificate is talking about a dead person. On top of this, my son assures me that there is no mention anywhere on the certificate of a death being confirmed.

You must have sent me the wrong document, Mr Muster. Presumably this was as a result of either the virus that struck down your computer, or of your own ill health. Please examine your files and send me the correct document by return.

Once I receive this document from you, I will complete the claims form and prepare everything to be sent off to the bank.

Just so that I am absolutely sure that I know what I am doing, could you please confirm exactly which documents I need to send to the bank, and reconfirm the address to which I should send them? I have to admit that I deleted the email I received from you which stated the bank's address, as I was afraid that my computer might catch the same virus as had afflicted your own.

I am going away for the weekend, so please try to get back to me before the end of the day so that I can sort everything out before I leave tonight. Otherwise, I will see to the paperwork first thing on Monday morning.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

PS. I am sorry to hear that you do not yet feel ready to find a partner. However, I will do as you ask and trawl through my records to see if I can find any possible matches based on the information - limited although it is - that I currently have about you. The most important thing is your age. Tell me, Mr Muster, how old are you?

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I am keen to move forward

Sent: Mon, 23 May 2005 09:37:23

Dear Mr Muster,

I am disappointed not to have received an answer to the email I sent you early on Friday afternoon. I am keen to move forward with this business, and I do not want it to be delayed any further: that virus that infected your computer and you sending me the wrong document has delayed us more than enough already.

Perhaps your delay in responding is a result of your current illness. I do hope that you are feeling better. If not, please endeavour to raise yourself from your sick bed and get back to me by return, confirming exactly which documents I need to send to the bank, along with the bank's address. Please also advise me what I should do about this death certificate business: you have definitely sent me the wrong document.

I expect to receive an answer from you before the end of the day.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

PS. I believe you also mentioned that these attorneys you have found require payment in advance. We need to speak about that: seeing as you have invested so much of your own money into this business already, I think I may be able to help us out there.

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I am keen to move forward

Sent: Mon, 23 May 2005 12:50:03 +0100 (BST)

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email(s).

I am sorry that I have not been able to respond to your emails as I do regularly, as I have been a little down and my health is just getting better.

I spent my whole Saturday in the clinic getting injections. I will try and respond to your email more frequently this week, as I would like us to make headway before the weekend and move on to conclude the transfer of the assets as soon as we possibly can.

I now understand your point. I guess I must have sent you the wrong document (ie the death certificate), as I remember the document that you speak of. But at this junction, there is a little problem as I have deleted it from my computer when I got heave that there was a virus in my computer. I would not have wanted this document to get into the wrong hands, so I had it deleted as I could not quarantine the virus, and at that point it had already infected the folder in which the virus was stored.

Not to worry, we will proceed as planned and what I will do is to contact Mr de Balint Jnr's attorneys and get another copy. After I get the copy, I will provide it to the attorney that will be working for us and he will submit it to the bank on the first meetings with the bank.

I guess we can proceed, and what you have to do now is to get the completed claim form and the completed power of attorney sent to the bank. You will have to also include a copy of your passport or driver's licence for identification purposes with the bank.

All the completed forms should be sent back to the bank directly at the following address:

Banca Unione di Credito, Piazza Dante 7, PO Box 2861, CH 6901 Lugano, Schweiz, Switzerland

Also, I don't know how you can help with the attorneys' fees? They request 2,850 Euros in service fees and they say we have to pay full fees in advance. Will you be able to handle payment of the fees in full? Kindly let me know soon.

I will try and get in touch with Mr de Balint Jnr's attorneys right now and I will give you a feedback later today.

Do let me know with regards to the attorneys' fees. I will give you an update later today.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I have an idea

Sent: Mon, 23 May 2005 14:51:38

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email. I am terribly sorry to hear that you are still unwell, my dear fellow. How dreadfully inconvenient for you. I trust that your injections - whatever they are - are having the desired effect and that your health returns to normal before too long.

You said that you were "a little down". Do you mean by this that you are suffering from depression? I have read that electric shock therapy can be extremely beneficial in treating depression. Perhaps you should consider signing up for a course of treatment once we have completed this transaction. Alternatively, you might like to try thinking of happy things, such as birds, trees and blue skies. I'd give that a try before the electrotherapy if I were you. After all, thinking happy thoughts is probably a lot less painful than having 240 volts of electricity directed into your cranial cavity.

But enough of these pleasantries. Regarding the late Mr de Balints' death certificate, I am pleased to hear that the fact that you sent me the wrong document need not delay us. It is a good job I noticed that you had sent me a completely unrelated document: no doubt the bank would have dismissed my claim out of hand if I had sent them that ancient passport and attempted to pass it off as a Yugoslavian death certificate. Kindly ensure that no similar errors occur as we move forward with this transaction, Mr Muster. Precision and attention to detail. That's what we need from now on.

Now then, about these attorneys. Of course I will be able to help out with the legal fees: don't worry about that. However, I have to say that these attorneys you have found do seem to be rather on the expensive side.

I was wondering whether it would be worth me getting my own lawyer, Welsby, involved in this business? He's a fine lawyer, and very well-respected in Lincolnshire legal circles. He also charges extremely reasonable fees.

Welsby's got the sharpest legal brain I've ever come across. He proved invaluable the other year after an unfortunate incident in which I unwittingly signed up a serial killer onto the books of my introduction agency. It was most distressing for all involved, and not at all good for business: it proved extremely difficult to persuade new people to sign up with the agency when my existing clients' bodies were being dragged out of Gypping Marsh at the rate of one a week by the local police.

Happily though, Welsby came through for us in the end, despite the multiple claims of corporate negligence: not only did he manage to get all charges against my business dropped, he also persuaded the judge to award us costs against the bereaved families.

I can't recommend Welsby highly enough. Let me know if you'd like me to contact him, my dear fellow. I am sure he would be able to help us out.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I have an idea

Sent: Mon, 23 May 2005 18:40:39 +0100 (BST)

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

When I said I was a little down, I meant I was still feeling unwell and I think it might be the effect of the injections. They are meant to help me rest.

With regards to the idea of involving your attorney in this case, I would say that there are enough reasons to discourage this. As I have told you from the onset, I would like us to keep this transaction in a closed loop, ie between the two of us.

I would think your friend in the legal profession would not approve of this if he knew that this money did not really belong to you and that we are making a false claim, as you are not the real next of kin. Of course, you don't have to tell him this, but I think if you had that much respect for him, you would let him know what is really going on, and I will not like the situation where it might later slip out and he gets to know and he is then in disagreement and does not want to continue to handle the case.

It would be a terrible tragedy if this happened halfway through the claim. I am not suggesting that it might occur, but my friend Mr Murray, I have known you to be a man who works with his conscience (but really, everybody has one).

For this same reason; I did not get someone I know and trusted for so many years to be the next of kin and I had to reach out to a total stranger and make a new friend.

It would be better for those who would be neutral on this situation to be the ones to handle that case. The attorneys might be expensive, but most Swiss attorneys know what is at stake in the claim of such accounts as the one in our case, and they know that the beneficiaries stand to gain so much, so they use it to their advantage. It's life.

I think it would be a better idea if we stuck to the original plan I had laid out, and I am sure everything will work out fine and as I planned. I have too much at stake to get things going wrong at the last minute.

I have been in touch with Mr de Balint Jnr's attorneys and they say they will get a photocopy of the death certificate couriered down to me later this week. I will also have a talk to the attorneys to represent us later tomorrow. I will try and get myself together before then, so I can move around. I do feel a lot better and I hope to be at peak performance in a few days.

Let me know when you wish to start the proceedings.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Are you sure I can't persuade you to give Welsby a try?

Sent: Tue, 24 May 2005 09:56:29

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email. I am pleased to hear that you are not in fact suffering from depression, although I am of course sorry to hear that you are still unwell. What exactly is ailing you, my dear fellow? I only hope that what you say is correct, and that you will be back to peak performance soon.

Are you sure I can't persuade you to give Welsby a try, Mr Muster? I appreciate what you say about the possibility that Welsby would not approve of this matter, but I really don't think this would be a problem. Welsby is a man of the world - aren't we all - and he knows full well when to turn a blind eye to things. Although he is scrupulously honest, he is not averse to bending the letter of the law from time to time when it is in his clients' interest to do so.

Welsby moves through the twists and turns of the legal jungle with the skill and finesse of a lithesome leopard clad in lycra. Going from my past experiences of dealing with him, I really do think he would be the ideal man to represent us in this case. And I am sure it would save us some money.

What do you say, Mr Muster? Shall I get in touch with him and ask him to swing into action on our behalf?

I am pleased to hear that you will be receiving a copy of the late Mr de Balint's death certificate later this week. I look forward to receiving a copy of it from you as soon as it is in your hands.

Do let me know about Welsby as soon as you can so that I know whose name to fill in on the power of attorney form you sent me.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: Are you sure I can't persuade you to give Welsby a try?

Sent: Tue, 24 May 2005 12:34:34 +0100 (BST)

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

You are a very persistent/persuasive man. One thing you have to realise is that if saving money was my priority in this transaction, I would have given up the option when Mr de Balint requested for $100,000 to get a copy of the death certificate from his attorneys.

One thing a lot of people will like to do is to spend very little money on a business and expect to gain a lot. It's the normal thing these days. You do have to realise that the Swiss attorneys are relatively very expensive, but they are the best at what they do.

They handle a lot of cases like ours regularly, and there are many people out there who have deceased relatives or loved ones who held Swiss bank accounts and I can assure you that if you ask a lot of them, 75% of these people use Swiss attorneys for the claims on their inheritance.

You have to give it a thought. Would you ask a UK banker to take care of your wealth or money in a Swiss jurisdiction or when you are thinking about evading taxes? I think not. Of course, you would ask a Swiss banker or other relative offshore bankers.

Needless to say, it is very normal for you to contact those who you think are best for the job, but you also have to consider the fact that you also have to give the job to those who know more about that field.

I have carefully thought of everything before I sent my proposal over to you. I will need you to stay with my plan. If finances are what you are worried about, please let me know. I would not like you to give me the impression that you have the finances to pay for the legal services and consultances, when really you don't have that much funds on you. Mr Murray, it will be a real waste of time if it came to that.

What I need to know is, can you handle the payment of the attorneys' fees?

Mr Murray, we are running round in circles and I will like us to make headway on this claim before this week runs out.

One more thing, the copy of the death certificate will be sent to the attorneys handling the case, and if you require a copy, I will send one over to you. But you will be sending over the forms and power of attorney to the bank without a copy present. I don't know when I will be able to get the copy in my hands and I will not like us to delay the submission of the forms because of this.

I don't mean to sound rude, but please stay on track with the original plan.

The name of the attorney to fill out on the power of attorney is the name of the representative I gave you with the INSAD SA legal firm.

I wait on your response and go ahead informing me when you have completed all the forms.

Do keep in touch.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Let us use the attorney that you suggest then

Sent: Tue, 24 May 2005 13:47:18

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email. I must admit, you made some salient points regarding our choice of attorney.

You too are a very persistent and persuasive man. So much so, in fact, that I have been swayed by your arguments. Let us do as you suggest, and move forward with the attorney you recommended in the first place.

I am rather busy with work this afternoon, but I will do my best to fill out the forms tonight and get them off in the post to the bank first thing in the morning. I trust that this will be satisfactory.

On another matter, you asked me to look through my records and try to find a suitable partner for you. As you have not yet told me your age, I have had to make an educated guess: given that you told me that you have retired from working at the bank, would I be right in thinking that you are in your late 60s or early 70s?

Assuming this to be the case, I have a charming old dear called Gladys on my books who may be just right for you. Gladys is 76 years old. She has been living on her own for the past seven years (since her husband died) and is now looking for a man for friendship, companionship, cribbage, and possibly romance. Gladys enjoys knitting and listening to the radio, and is reasonably well-preserved for her age: she tells me that she still has most of her own teeth.

What do you think, Mr Muster? Would you be interested in exchanging information with Gladys? Do let me know and I will make the necessary arrangements.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: Let us use the attorney that you suggest then

Sent: Tue, 24 May 2005 18:09:29 +0100 (BST)

Dear friend Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I am glad that you see things my way. I have thought things out very carefully and I have also tried to cover all loops that might not make this deal go through. That is why I am very persistent that we do things the way I have planned it out. Mind you, it took me a good number of months to get this whole deal in phase.

The next step is to complete all the forms and the power of attorney that I sent over and mail them to the bank soonest. Also, don't forget to include a copy of your passport or driver's licence with these documents. The bank will require a form of identification.

Also I will like to know when it would be most suited for you to make transfer of the attorneys' fees? I think it will be best to make the payment of the attorneys' fees this week. I will like things to work like the clock (every piece fitting into the other at the right time).

I will also have to meet with Mr Ihdle (sic) also to get all payment details, but first I need to know if it will be convenient for you to make the transfer of the fees sometime this week.

One last thing, I am just a little over 55; precisely, I am 57 years old and I think Gladys is a little too old for me.

Someone in the age range of 40-50 will do just OK. Let me know if you have any openings.

Let me know with regards to the attorneys' fees and when you send out the forms.

Keep in touch.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I have completed the forms

Sent: Wed, 25 May 2005 09:23:25

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email. You will be pleased to hear that I have completed the forms and that they are now ready to be sent off to the bank. All I need to do is to pop into town and visit the library in order to photocopy my passport, then I can get the forms in the post. I will do that this morning.

You said in your last email that you were going to be meeting up with someone called "Mr Ihdle". Who is this? I thought we were going to keep the details of this business strictly between ourselves and your chosen attorney (and the evil, drug-smuggling Mr de Balint Jnr, of course). What does this Mr Ihdle have to do with anything?

Now then, Mr Muster, I am going to be perfectly honest with you. I have to tell you that I am rather annoyed with you. I went to a lot of trouble to try and match you up with your ideal partner, but thanks to the extremely limited information you gave me - you didn't even give me your age until yesterday - it appears that all my hard work has been wasted.

If you had filled in the questionnaire I sent to you the other week, I would have had a much better idea of your personality and of the type of woman you are looking for, and I wouldn't have wasted so much of my time searching through my records for an older woman as a result. On top of this, Gladys is going to be so disappointed.

This simply won't do, Mr Muster. I am a busy man, and I am not prepared to waste any more of my valuable time simply because you can't be bothered to spend five minutes filling in a simple form. I still have a large number of women between 40 and 50 on my books - the unfortunate events of last year not withstanding - and in order to have some chance of success in finding you the perfect partner, I must insist that you fill in that questionnaire and send it back to me at once. I will then be able to carry out a more detailed search based on your own criteria, rather than flapping around in the dark as I have been forced to do up to now.

Kindly fill in the questionnaire and send it back to me by return. I expect to receive it from you later today.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I have posted those forms

Sent: Wed, 25 May 2005 17:10:17

Dear Mr Muster,

I have just returned from town, where I visited the library and photocopied my passport. I then posted off the German claim form, the power of attorney and the photocopy of my passport to the bank.

I would appreciate it if you could deal with the points I raised in my previous email as a matter of urgency, then we can make some progress here.

For your information, next Monday is a public holiday here in the UK, and my wife and I are making the most of it by going away for a long weekend. As a result of this, I will be unavailable from Friday lunchtime until Tuesday morning. I trust that this will not be a problem; presumably it will take a few days for the documents to reach the bank in Zurich anyway. However, it would be nice if we could get move this transaction a little further on before the weekend.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

Gilbert did actually post the documents to the bank. However, he neglected to put any postage stamps on the envelope (he doctored it to make it look as if the stamps had fallen off). Hopefully, the scammer will be put to some inconvenience and will have to pay an excess postage charge in order to receive the documents. That's if they get delivered at all...

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I have posted those forms

Sent: Wed, 25 May 2005 17:29:41 +0100 (BST)

Mr dear friend Mr Murray,

You seem to have forgotten that "Mr Ihde" is the attorney that will be representing our case with the bank.

If you make reference to the email that I sent to you earlier, you will notice that I mentioned this here. If you will also take note, I typed his name wrongly in my last email to you. I would like to believe that this was what caused the misunderstanding. He is the one I am meant to meet with.

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Update

Sent: Wed, 25 May 2005 20:29:51 +0100 (BST)

Dear Mr Murray,

I hope you got my last email? Anyway, let me know if you did get it.

I had a little talk with the attorney Mr Ihde and he says that as long as you have sent the forms back to the bank, he can start work on the case ASAP. He also says that he will be leaving for the United States tomorrow till Thursday next week (he has a divorce case to tend to there), but that he will take a look at the case and prepare his papers for the first meeting with the bank next week.

By that time the forms should already be at the bank and the bank officials will have taken a look at them. He says he will contact the bank next week on Tuesday by telephone from the States to inquire whether or not they have the forms, so he can schedule a meeting and present his case.

I asked him about the payment and he says that he will require a cash payment up front (no cheques, he says) before he can start preparing for the meeting with the bank.

I asked him if we could send the payment to him while he is in the States and he has not given me a particular response to this. He says I should see him again tomorrow morning and he will give me a decision with regards to the payment. I will give you a feedback tomorrow morning on this.

Just in case, get the fees ready with you.

Have a good evening.

Regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I am in receipt of your emails

Sent: Thu, 26 May 2005 09:48:22

Dear Mr Muster,

I did indeed receive the two emails you sent me yesterday. However, I have been rather busy with work - I have to get quite a few things sorted out before my long weekend away and I am still trying to catch up on things following the time I wasted trying to find you an ideal partner in her 70s - and therefore I have not had chance to respond to you until today.

To be perfectly frank, Mr Muster, I am still rather annoyed with you, as you still have not sent me back that questionnaire. How on earth am I supposed to find the woman of your dreams if you don't give me some idea of the type of person you're looking for? I don't want to have to let down another of my clients, like I had to let down Gladys the other day. The poor woman was most upset. She was so looking forward to meeting you, especially after I told her that you were a complete merchant banker.

I must insist that you complete the questionnaire today, and send it back to me, Mr Muster. Not only have you caused me to waste valuable time by not filling it in, I also feel personally affronted.

Regarding your explanation about "Mr Ihdle", I understand now that he and Mr Ihde are one and the same person. See what confusion a simple spelling mistake can make, Mr Muster? Remember, my dear fellow, precision and attention to detail are what we need. I would have thought that as a banker - especially a Swiss banker - precision and attention to detail would have been your swatchwords.

Send me back my completed questionnaire, Mr Muster. Only then will I forgive you for the trouble and upset you have caused me. Then, and only then, we can talk about sorting out these attorneys' fees.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Kindly do get back to me ASAP

Sent: Thu, 26 May 2005 11:20:04 +0100 (BST)

My dear friend Mr Murray,

Thank you for the email and all contents were noted.

I would like you to read through the email you sent me which I received earlier today. I have copied it below this email.

I would really like to know which of the two things that you are doing right now is your priority: (1) claiming this money, or (2) finding me a partner?

I think # 2 is your main priority and it is your full concentration on this that is making the matter more complicated. I don't know why you make things that seem so simple very extremely difficult.

Let me get one thing straight between us, I will send you back the questionnaire when I am ready to meet someone. I don't think I will be ready to meet someone for the next six months. I hope this is now clear!! I know you do have many single men on you register, so please match the single men with the single women. I don't think I am the only single man that you know. Am I right?

I am not usually a man of too many words, but Mr Murray, you always make me have to type such lengthy emails in order to get a point/explanation across. I know you are a very wise and learned man and I don't really think this should be the case.

I hope this is not all a practical joke and you are serious about helping out to claim this money. If you are not, please don't waste my time. To be perfectly frank, Mr Murray, I don't have time to waste.

And if, because of your questionnaire, you would like to terminate our partnership, I don't object. But I think you will not be the same wise individual I thought you were, to throw away millions for a piece of paper.

Now, back to the real business at hand. I have met with Mr Ihde earlier today and he has left for the United States on a flight early this morning. He has told me that the payment can be sent to him via Western Union. I hope you have Western Union outlets located in your vicinity?

The fees will have to be paid out in US currency.

Let me know if the payment can be made today. I am still waiting on the transfer details for the payment and I will get it over to you as soon as I get it in.

On another note, Mr de Balint's death certificate copy should be on its way already and I hope I have it before the weekend so I can send it over to the bank. If I don't, I will send it on Monday morning.

Do get back to me ASAP.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I was only trying to do you a favour

Sent: Thu, 26 May 2005 12:30:51

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email. You ask about my priorities. Naturally, my main priority is claiming this money: the future expansion of my business depends on the successful conclusion of this transaction.

But regarding this questionnaire, Mr Muster. I was only trying to do you a favour, in return for the good turn you are doing me. I simply wished to show my appreciation towards you by attempting to do what I do best: finding you the ideal partner and putting an end to your current lonely existence. We all need somebody, Mr Muster. I was hoping to be able to find the perfect woman to share your autumn years with you.

But no. You have thrown this offer back in my face, without even a thank-you. I am hurt, Mr Muster, truly I am. Well, so be it. Despite this personal affront, I am still keen to work with you towards the conclusion of this transaction. I will just have to forget about the insensitive way in which you have turned down my generous offer of help and put my personal feelings to one side. With this in mind, let us continue.

This fee that the attorney requires. You say that he requires the fee up front, before he starts work on this matter for us? I must say, Mr Muster, this is very unusual. Whenever I have had dealings with solicitors and lawyers before, they have always provided me with their services and presented me with a bill afterwards. That is certainly the way in which the eminent Welsby operates, and I had assumed that this was the way in which lawyers operated all around the world. Are things so different in Switzerland?

Regarding the fee, please remind me of the exact amount that Mr Ihde requires and I will see what I can do. I think we do have a couple of Western Union agents in town: I am sure that I have seen Western Union signs up outside the local bureaux de change.

However, do you think it would be possible for us to pay Mr Ihde his fee via a direct bank transfer into his account? That would seem to be the more logical approach. It would certainly be a less expensive way of getting the money to him. Do let me know.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I was only trying to do you a favour

Sent: Thu, 26 May 2005 19:04:01 +0200

My dear Mr Murray,

I am not saying that I don't appreciate the kind gesture you offered, but this was a little distraction for me on this deal, as I am not ready to meet anyone at this point. I never said I did not appreciate the thought.

I can say that the questionnaire was also a little distraction for you also, if I could think of it like this.

For instance, I recall having mentioned at least two to three times the fees which Mr Ihde requested for his services. He is asking for 2,850 Euros and I recall you saying that you can help with all the fees. I strikingly recall asking you if you will be able to take care of all the fees or if you will need me to source out some funds to mark up whatever you can come up with.

You said that the fees will not be any problem.

As you have again compared Mr Welsby and other solicitors or lawyers you have used in the past (people who you probably have known and you have worked with more than once), to a total stranger, Mr Ihde. I don't like to always point out the obvious points, but Mr Murray, would you render services to a total stranger, whom you have not had any dealings with, without any up front payments? I think not, especially if you were a lawyer.

Things are not "so different in Switzerland", but I think things are done the same way all over the world, especially if you are not familiar with your clients.

I also think Western Union is the best option, as Mr Ihde says that he has to receive a cash up front payment and the quickest way to confirm the cash to Mr Ihde is through Western Union. If you made a bank transfer, it would probably not show on his accounts till Monday morning, and only on confirmation of the payment will he start work. It will take him only a few hours to confirm the payment via Western Union.

I am still waiting for Mr Ihde's transfer details and when I have them I will send them to you later tonight.

One thing I will hope you will do is, to "please" try and trust my judgement. I know what I am doing and I wish you will be able to give me the benefit of the doubt on any decisions I make with regards to our partnership. This is something that seems a bit hard for you to do.

Anyway, I hope this will change later as we proceed.

I will get back to you in a couple of hours. Keep in touch.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Payment Details

Sent: Thu, 26 May 2005 19:08:59 +0100 (BST)

My dear friend Mr Murray,

I hope you received my last email a few hours ago with response to the various questions you posed in your email to me earlier today?

I have just been in touch by phone with Mr Ihde at the hotel he is staying at in the United States. He gave me the following details for the transfer of the funds (fees: 2,850 Euros) to him via Western Union:

Recipient's Name: Craig Ihde

Address: 385 S Catalina Ave, Apt 102, Pasadena, CA 91106, USA

As I have already told you about the questionnaire, I am sorry if you feel I rudely turned down your offer, but I think that at this time, finding a partner is not my bid.

I will not have that much time for pleasantries and I think after I get my share of the money, I can travel the world and meet new people and I think this will be the best time for "love" in my life.

I will also like you to know that Mr Ihde is one of the best attorneys that was recommended, and I am sure that your attorney Mr Welsby is highly noted as well, but you cannot expect a total stranger to work for you for free, as there is no guarantee that you will pay for his services. I guess most professionals don't work this way.

Kindly do transfer the funds before you leave on your long weekend and send me the transfer control number together with your own details, as I have provided for Mr Ihde above, so he can collect the money and prepare his case against next week.

I will like this to move as quickly as possible, as we have spent so many weeks on this and we are not even halfway.

Kindly get back to me with any comments tonight or early tomorrow and I will get back in touch with you by 9 or 10am tomorrow morning. Keep in touch.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: DC received this morning

Sent: Fri, 27 May 2005 08:43:15 +0100 (BST)

Dear Mr Murray,

Good morning. I have just received this morning a copy of Mr de Balint's death certificate which was forwarded to me by the son's legal advisers.

It was delivered by UPS and I am on my way to forward it to the bank via post.

I was expecting an email from you early this morning. I hope you got both my emails from yesterday. Kindly do let me know if you can have the funds available for transfer via Western Union later today?

Please advise. I will like us to get the proceedings initiated.

Kindly give me an update when you get my email.

Regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Regarding Mr Ihde's fee

Sent: Fri, 27 May 2005 10:46:23

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your emails. I apologise if my attempts to find you the perfect partner have distracted you from the business at hand. Given the litany of errors you have made in this business so far - allowing your computer to become infected with a virus, addressing me as "Lady Agatha", quite unnecessarily and completely inappropriately commenting on the size of your manhood in a most disparaging manner, neglecting to explain all areas of the German claim form adequately to me when I first asked you to, sending me some ancient passport instead of the late Mr de Balint's death certificate, getting Mr Ihde's name wrong - you obviously find it difficult to concentrate on more than one thing at a time. Maybe it is therefore best if we do as you suggest, and leave finding you the woman of your dreams until we have completed this transaction.

Regarding Mr Ihde's fee, I suppose that this will not be a problem. However, I must say that he does charge in a most unusual way for a lawyer. Take it from me, Mr Muster, in the legal world it is common practice for lawyers to charge their fees after the successful completion of the services, not before, as Mr Ihde is doing. I know this, because I looked it up last night in my Penguin Guide to the Law (a most useful book, which Welsby kindly gave me some years back: I can recommend it highly). No lawyer I have ever heard of demands fees up front before carrying out their services; that is simply not the done thing. Are you sure that this Mr Ihde is fully up to date on accepted legal practices, Mr Muster?

Now then, about the details you have given me for the transfer of the fees to Mr Ihde. I could hardly believe my eyes when I read your email. You said that Mr Ihde was staying in a hotel while he was in the United States, but the address you have given me - and I still can't quite believe the coincidence - isn't that of a hotel; it's the address of a block of residential apartments. I know this because - quite unbelievably, I'm sure you'll agree - my niece actually lives in that very block of apartments!

Isn't that an amazing coincidence, Mr Muster? My niece moved over to the States over twenty years ago after meeting an American chap whilst on holiday in Rotherham. He charmed the pants off her - quite literally, by all accounts - and she ended up moving over to Pasadena and marrying him. And they both now live in that very block of apartments! It is a small world, isn't it?

I actually went over to the States and visited my niece and her husband in that apartment block a couple of years back. It's a charming place, just around the corner from the Pasadena City College, off the East California Boulevard, and just a block away from the California Institute of Technology. Or at least it used to be a charming place. According to my niece, the old manager, Scott, left a few months ago and his replacement, Joyce, just isn't up to the job. My niece reckons that the place is going downhill fast since she took over. She says that there are serious problems with the plumbing too.

Anyway, that's by the by. The point of this is that surely Mr Idhe has given you the wrong address? You say that he's staying in a hotel, but you've given me the address of a residential apartment block. Surely this must be another mistake?

I really think we ought to get all the details right before I transfer such a large amount of money. After all, we don't want anything to go wrong with a financial transfer of that size, do we? Especially not when there is so much at stake.

As I told you, Mr Muster, I am going away this afternoon for a long weekend. This doen't give me enough time to make the money transfer this week - certainly not now that you have given me an address which is obviously wrong. There seems to be no alternative but for us to wait until next week for me to transfer the money.

Perhaps between then and now you could have a word with Mr Ihde and see if you can persuade him to act like a proper lawyer, and request payment for his services after he has performed them, and not before? You could tell him to refer to the Penguin Guide to the Law: he is bound to have a copy.

You could also try getting the address of the hotel he is staying at. Mind you, by the time I am back next week, presumably Mr Ihde will have returned from the States, so I imagine I will be able to transfer the money directly to him in Switzerland instead.

I have to say, Mr Muster, these constant errors of yours are becoming a real irritation. I had hoped we would have made considerably more progress on this matter by now.

Anyway, I am sure we will be able to get everything sorted out next week. Do enjoy your weekend, my dear fellow. Let me know how you get on with Mr Ihde, then I will be back in touch as soon as I return next week.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

PS. That is good news about Mr de Balint's death certificate. Please scan it in and send me a copy by return.

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Now it's all clear to me

Sent: Fri, 27 May 2005 12:15:23 +0100 (BST)

Dear Mr Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I apologise if most of the content of my email to you today may sound very inappropriate. I think I will like you to open your ears and listen to this once, as I will say this only one time!

I really do not believe that you have the best interest of this claim at heart. I have noticed this, when the whole issue of the questionnaire came up. Your "bright" ideas or "suggestions" seem to be more of a distraction. When I started working on a way to get this money out of the bank, I did not have only myself to think about. This is the difference between the two of us.
The address I gave you was the address of Mr Ihde's current client. As he told me, he will be visiting her on a regular basis with regards to the divorce with her husband. It's quite a coincidence that your niece stays at this same block of flats. Quite a coincidence... I would advise you check with her, she might be the one filing for a divorce with her so called romeo "American chap" husband... I am sure that would be a better coincidence; don't you think so, Mr Murray?
Specifically, when I wrote you the email with the payment details; I told you that Mr Ihde was staying at a hotel and I did not say "the address for the pickup of the funds will be the hotel address". Nor did I say "this is the hotel address"! Did I give you such an impression?
Mr Ihde has not given me a wrong address, so you can update your information, in case you are expecting another address! It is a correct address. You are always trying to make a point, but in the end it seems that you really just want to know everything... I don't know what exactly you are looking for. If you would like to play games, I am ready to play games.
For your information, these constant errors of mine are all thanks to you and if these are becoming a real irritation to you, believe me my dear fellow, you have made this word "irritation" an understatement a long time ago.
Sorry my dear fellow, I have already sent the death certificate to the bank by post before your email came in, so I don't have a copy to scan and give to you.

Finally, you do not provide a good working partnership as you don't EVER heed to my instructions.

If you think your "Welsby" fellow is the best attorney for this case, please do proceed with him. You have the address of the bank, he can fly over and meet with the bank with regards to the claim; you have all that you need to proceed with the claim... but count me out on this idea! Without Mr de Balint Jnr's consent, there is no deal!

I also think you read very well right, so read very well through your Penguin Guide to the Law. You should be able to find that any lawyer or attorney has the right to bill his client for his services as he wishes. Your suggestion only applies to small time lawyers (the class to which I think Welsby belongs). You keep trying to compare Mr Welsby to Mr Ihde; what arrant nonsense. You are comparing a lawyer in a small town such as yours to Mr Ihde?

Mr Ihde has handled many cases like ours before in the past and it has become somewhat of a speciality for him.

Ask people who have made such claims like this before and a lot of them will tell you that they have spent thousands of dollars to claim their inherited estates; and here you are...

If paying Mr Ihde's fees will leave a very big hole in your pocket, I will pay the fees. But one thing is that I don't think I can work with you any more... you have given me more problems than solutions to this case.

I will think it over this weekend and let you know if I would still like you to be part of this. I think my decision is already made, but I will keep in touch. I have to speak to Mr Ihde if there would be any possibility to cancel the claim at this stage.

Well anyway, if he can't do anything about it, I guess we still can't touch the money unless Mr de Balint Jnr gives a go-ahead. I guess he is the one that I will talk to.

I will keep in touch. Have a pleasant weekend and you will get my decision soon.

Regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I think we need to step back and look at this calmly

Sent: Sat, 28 May 2005 16:28:34

Dear Mr Muster,

I have just read the email you sent to me yesterday - quite unexpectedly, the hotel where Mrs Murray and I are staying for the weekend has internet access in the lounge. It took me some time before I could get access to the hotel's computer - it seems to be monopolised by a group of spotty teenagers who seem to spend the entire day in internet chat rooms talking to their friends back home - but I managed to get access to it in the end and I thought I would quickly check my email to see if you had managed to find out the address of Mr Ihde's hotel.

I have to say, Mr Muster, I was shocked and surprised when I read your email. I am disappointed that our professional relationship seems to have deteriorated to such a degree that you appear to be accusing me of lying over the matter of my niece's apartment.

Let me tell you something, Mr Muster. I may be many things, but a liar is not one of them, and I do not take being called a liar lightly.

You obviously do not believe me when I tell you that my niece lives in the same block of apartments as Mr Ihde's client. Admittedly, this is indeed a huge coincidence - I can still barely believe it myself - but coincidences do happen. Why on earth should I lie to you about this? What conceivable purpose would it serve?

Check it out for yourself if you don't believe me: get Mr Ihde to ask his client if what I told you about my niece's apartment block is true. Get him to ask his client whether the manager of the apartment block is called Joyce, and whether Joyce replaced the previous manager, Scott. Get him to ask his client whether the place has started to go downhill since Scott left. Get him to ask his client whether they have problems with their plumbing (due to old and corroded water pipes, according to my niece).

Check it out if you don't believe me, Mr Muster. In fact, I want you to check it out. That seems to be the only way to prove that I am telling you the truth. Check it out, and let me know whether Mr Ihde's client confirms what I have told you.

Now then, for whatever reason, you are obviously upset. For that reason, I am prepared to ignore the numerous personal insults that your last email contained - aimed at both myself and at the eminent Welsby. I am not prepared to lower myself to the same level and respond to them.

Mr Muster, it seems to me that you and I are somewhat incompatible individuals: we seem to have a knack of rubbing each other up the wrong way. While this would be a large problem if we were friends or relations, I do not think that we should allow it to jeopardise our business relationship. We both need this business to work out, and for that to happen, we need to work together. Therefore, I suggest that we should put aside our differences for the remainder of this business relationship, and get on with the job at hand.

I presume that we are both man enough to be able to do this. Are you in agreement?

I must go now: Mrs Murray is gesturing for me to join her for afternoon tea. Think carefully about what I have said, Mr Muster. Despite the divisions that have somehow arisen between us, I believe that we can still work together and conclude this transaction successfully. Please let me know if you agree. I sincerely hope that you do.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I have returned from my weekend away

Sent: Tue, 31 May 2005 10:04:28

Dear Mr Muster,

I have returned from my weekend away. I had a very pleasant time. I trust that you had a good weekend too - I assume that yesterday was a bank holiday in Switzerland as well as in this country. I also trust that by now you will have had time to reflect on the current situation regarding our business transaction.

I presume that you will have had chance by now to confirm with Mr Idhe's American client that I have been telling you the truth about my niece living in the same apartment block, no matter how unlikely a coincidence this appears to be. That is the thing about coincidences, Mr Muster: they are by their very nature unlikely. If they were not unlikely, they would not be coincidences.

As I have already told you, Mr Muster, I am a very meticulous man, and I like things to be done properly and correctly at all times. However, looking back over our correspondence, I feel that I may have been somewhat picky over one or two of your errors. I apologise if I have upset you by pointing out your frequent mistakes once too often.

I am also aware that I have questioned quite a number of things that you have asked me to do. This is in my nature, Mr Muster. However, I can appreciate that you and Mr Idhe obviously know what you are doing in this matter - even if appearances sometimes indicate otherwise - and I would like to assure you that from this moment onwards I will follow your instructions to the letter without question.

Mr Muster, for me to be able to expand my business as I intend, I need this transaction to be a success. The forms I have signed are already on their way to the bank - indeed they may have already arrived - so I suggest that we put our differences behind us and work together towards the successful conclusion of this business.

Please get back to me by return and let me know your thoughts on this matter.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I have returned from my weekend away

Sent: Tue, 31 May 2005 12:14:02 +0100 (BST)

Dear Mr Murray,

I got your email and I read the last one on Saturday.

I had already tried to contact Mr Ihde for procedures to cancel the claim on your name, but I have been doing some thinking. One thing I have thought about is that it has taken me some time to get a partner (you) who can help with the claim of Mr de Balint's assets at the bank on behalf of his son.

I have thought about all that you have said and I know that it's not every time that people get along, ie because I work for someone does not mean I have to like the person. I could give examples of a few of my bosses when I worked at the Unione Banca di Credito (Zurich branch) that I was not really in tune with, but that did not mean that I had to quit my job. Maybe not quit, but I got a transfer. This is by the way.

I will be very frank with you Mr Murray. You know how to easily get under my skin. Not many people usually know how to do that, especially in the very short time that they have known me. I am a very patient person, but I think the reason why my patience ran thin in this situation is that we are dealing with a large sum of money here!

If I decide to start looking for another partner, I don't know how long it will take me to build up my trust in that person, because this is the # 1 issue I will have to face first.

Mr Murray, there are procedures that have to be followed and I have done my research with regards to this claim to avoid any foul-ups. You have to understand this. I have a specific plan and I will like to go by it. I am not saying that I cannot accommodate your suggestions, but I think you should let "the driver drive the car and the cycler (sic) ride the bicycle". I hope you understand what I mean. I have realised that both our natures are quite different and this is very natural with human beings.

Mr Murray, I am willing to continue with you on the claim of Mr de Balint's assets and I am sure that we are both doing this in the interest of both our individual selves. Everybody is looking out for their own interest.

Before I decide to re-establish our partnership, I will need your assurance that you will try at the barest minimum to get under my skin (sic) and also you will follow all my "simple" instructions and you will not have any of your regular "bright ideas". I am not saying that your ideas are not worth considering, but at this stage it will not be best to be making last minute changes that are not exactly certain (if you know what I mean).

We will have to work not just as businessmen, but as partners. This is very important, or things will run amok.

I guess coincidences do happen, but I have not taken time to ask Mr Ihde with regards to your niece and the block of apartments where his client stays. I guess I have not taken the time to investigate this, because I will take your word for it. I will also like you to learn to do this.

I think the terms I have stated above are very flexible and should be able to suit you. Let me know if my terms create a suitable working environment for you. After I receive a response from you later today, I will inform you on all proceedings to be made to make our partnership something we can both smile about in a few weeks to come.

We have set the ball rolling already. I suggest it continues rolling till it gets home.

I will expect a response from you soon.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Let us move forward in partnership

Sent: Tue, 31 May 2005 16:31:08

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email. I am pleased to see that, like me, you are willing to put our personal differences behind us and to continue working in partnership towards the successful conclusion of this transaction.

In terms of our personalities, I suppose you could say that we are as different as chalk and cheese. However, the differences in our personalities need not get in the way of a successful partnership. In fact, we could view our differences as a strength. When I think about it, many of history's most successful partnerships have consisted of two people with widely differing personalities: think of Anthony and Cleopatra, Tate and Lyle, Arm and Hammer, Laurel and Hardy, Richard and Judy... all partnerships that were made stronger by the differences between the two partners.

I imagine that now we have got things out into the open and cleared the air, we will find it much easier to work with one another. Now that we both know what pushes each others' buttons, it should be easier to avoid irritating each other. I, for my part, will make a conscious effort to follow your instructions to the letter and without question. Perhaps, for your part, you could make a conscious effort to stop making so many mistakes. In return, I will make a conscious effort to stop bringing the mistakes that you do make to your attention so assiduously.

I have to admit that I was slightly baffled by your suggestion that I let "the driver drive the car and the cycler ride the bicycle" (I think by "cycler" you mean "cyclist" here), but I think I get the general idea of what you mean. I for one am willing to drive or pedal as fast as I possibly can for the good of this transaction. Like you, my dear fellow, I too very much look forward to smiling about our partnership in the days and weeks to come.

As you say, Mr Muster, the ball is rolling, so let us do our best to keep it in the air. I place myself in your hands, Mr Muster. The ball is now in your court: please tell me what our next step should be. I presume that seeing as Mr Idhe will be back in Switzerland in the next day or so, I will need to make arrangements to transfer the money to him in Zurich.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray (your partner)

PS. Have you heard whether or not the bank has received those documents from me yet?

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: Let us move forward in partnership

Sent: Tue, 31 May 2005 19:44:26 +0100 (BST)

My dear friend Mr Murray,

Thank you for the email. I think we both have a common interest at hand and I don't think we should have any personal differences as an obstacle that we cannot put aside. I will be willing to put aside all obstacles and move forward with this partnership.

With regards to your question on whether the bank has received the forms, well I don't know about this. Perhaps Mr Ihde should be able to confirm this from them on contact with them.

In a telephone conversation with him about an hour ago, he informed me that he would not be back in Zurich till the weekend. The final hearing on the case he is handling will be on Friday afternoon (US time) and he will be on the next flight after the final judgement is made. Or he will request for an adjournment as he told me, so that he can come over and tend to our matter, as I told him it was a matter or urgency that we start the proceedings with the bank. A lot of time has already been lost.

He has asked that I remit his fees to him as he had requested. I think I might have given him the impression that I will be the one sending the money. No matter, as long as he can pick up the funds.

It is really urgent we then get the fees over to him, so he can at least contact the bank and inform them of the proceedings and that he will be meeting with them next week. It is also important that he contacts the bank this week so everything can be up and running towards Monday.

Mr Murray, I would hope you can make the transfer of the funds via Western Union to Mr Ihde first thing tomorrow morning (UK/Zurich time), so by morning (US time) (about 1-2pm UK/Zurich time) he can pick up the funds and get in touch with the bank before closing hours.

I guess you still have all the transfer information where he will be able to pick up the funds? In case you don't, I have attached it again below:

Recipient's name: Craig Ihde

Address to be used for pick up: 385 S Catalina Ave, Pasadena, CA 91106, USA

The fees (2,850 Euros) should please be made collectable in US currency.

Mr Murray, I guess you will get in touch with me with regards to this payment first thing tomorrow morning? Kindly do let me know. We are working on a clock tight schedule.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I will transfer the money right away

Sent: Wed, 01 Jun 2005 09:29:41

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email. In keeping with the terms of our new working relationship, I will follow your instructions without question: I shall head into town straight away and transfer the money to Mr Ihde.

I will contact you as soon as I return from town to let you know that the money has been transferred.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: A slight problem

Sent: Wed, 01 Jun 2005 11:01:33

Dear Mr Muster,

I am sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but I have been unable to transfer the money to Mr Ihde via Western Union.

I drove into town as soon as I had sent my last email to you, and went straight to the bank to withdraw the money. Converted into Pounds Sterling, it came to approximately 1,927. With the money in my wallet, I then went directly to the nearest Western Union agent.

However, when I attempted to transfer the money to Mr Ihde, the Western Union agent informed me that the maximum amount you are allowed to transfer from the UK to the USA is 999.99 - approximately half the amount I wanted to transfer. When I questioned the reason for this limit, the Western Union agent told me that the limit was in place in order to deter fraudsters from using the Western Union system.

The agent then asked me why I wanted to transfer such a large amount of money via Western Union. She said that transferring such large amounts was very unusual. Obviously, I didn't want to give too much away about the nature of our transaction - after all, it could be argued that we are sailing rather close to the wind of the law in this affair - so I gave her as little information as I possibly could. I didn't mention you, the late Mr de Balint, or the evil Mr de Balint Jnr; I merely told the agent that I was transferring the money to pay a lawyer his fees.

Well, Mr Muster, as soon as the Western Union agent heard this, she started asking a lot of questions. She told me that for a professional person such as a lawyer to ask for their fees to be paid via Western Union was highly unusual, and believe it or not, Mr Muster, she asked me if I was sure that Mr Idhe really was a lawyer! She seemed to be suggesting that Mr Idhe could be some sort of fraudster!

I thanked the Western Union agent for her concern, but I told her not to worry, and that Mr Idhe was an internationally-renowned lawyer who had been personally recommended to me by a business partner who I trust implicitly (you). By this time, I was starting to get rather uncomfortable with the agent's continued questioning, so I made my excuses and made to leave. However, as I walked through the door, the agent called after me and warned that I should be extremely careful in my dealings with anyone I didn't know personally who asked me to transfer a large amount of money to them via Western Union, as apparently once the money has been transferred, there is no way it can be traced.

Well, Mr Muster, this puts us in a rather awkward situation. By the sounds of it, transferring the money to Mr Idhe via Western Union is not an option. However, there must be some other way we can get the money to Mr Idhe. As a lawyer, he must have a corporate bank account that he uses to receive payments from his clients. If you can get the details of the bank account from Mr Idhe and pass them onto me, I will transfer the money into his account immediately. Or do you have a better idea?

Do get back to me as soon as you can. I am sure we will find a way around this temporary setback.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: A slight problem

Sent: Wed, 01 Jun 2005 14:45:46 +0100 (BST)

Dear Mr Murray,

Thank you for the email. I have not been able to check my email all morning, as I went out earlier this morning to pay some bills and I just got in.

Again, you have not done anything other than not to surprise me. Do you know, Mr Murray, if I bet a lot of money on you that I could predict what would happen next in this partnership, I would be a very rich man.

The first mistake that you have made is to have revealed to a total stranger, "the Western Union agent", the slight nature of our partnership. I think if she really knew what you were up to, she would be very cross with you, don't you think? Perhaps you should have told her the whole story, rather than to give her hints to keep her curiosity bubbling!

There seems to be a problem here, as this is the second time there has been a break in our confidentiality agreement. The first time, it was with your son, revealing the documents I sent you to him, but thank GOD you did, as the bank will have been wondering if we were trying to pose a practical joke with that wrong document.

Secondly, I hope you did not give this total stranger an idea that you had a heap sum of money somewhere? I hope you know that if you keep spreading this news, the tax agents will be right on your back investigating you and you might end up with nothing at the end.

I don't really think it's any of the Western Union agent's business what you do with your money and I don't know why you accommodated her with the chit chat and revealing that you were making payments to an attorney. If you were making the payment to your son, your father, or simply a business partner, it's not her business. Did you not know that when you give someone an inch they always take a mile these days? Did you think she would stop asking questions?

Sometimes Mr Murray, I wonder If I have the right person for this partnership. A lot of things you do make me very doubtful.

I think I understand where the problem lies, as your statement tells it all: "I should be extremely careful in my dealings with anyone I didn't know personally who asked me to transfer a large amount of money to them via Western Union, as apparently once the money has been transferred, there is no way it can be traced".

As I said, you cease to amaze me. There is no use in pretending there is any trust you have in me, as I have sensed it a long time ago that you don't really have faith in this partnership and business, and I will like you to know that if things continue this way, I'm sorry but we'd better call it quits.

You are making me look like a very unserious person in the eyes of Mr Ihde. I want you to know one thing: it is because of my urgent request and incessant telephone calls that Mr Ihde is considering asking for an adjournment on his case by Friday so he can be back in Switzerland by the weekend.

How many times would you want me to keep apologising to Mr Ihde, as I keep giving him the impression of urgency on our case and I don't live up to his expectation? He has asked us to send his fees, so he can confirm that we have made payment for his services and he can do his work.

And as the Western Union agent said, for a professional person such as a lawyer to ask for his fees to be paid by Western Union is quite unusual. I really don't see anything unusual with this. Not everybody has access to his or her accounts online.

Well I don't really know his reasons for this, but he must have his reasons. Also, a transfer like this would take at least two days to clear onto his accounts. It would be the weekend by then and I am sure if he does not have online banking, he has to wait till Monday to confirm the payment, and in case he might have to ask for an adjournment on the divorce case, he has to do this on the hearing on Friday. If not, he will not be able to leave the States. And I don't even know if I would be able to get his bank details accurately today over the phone for that matter!

This is what I am talking about, Mr Murray. You have started making me think off track with your suggestions and ideas, or should I say "your natural charm".

There is a simple way to solve all problems, but you seem to look for the hard way out. The Western Union agent told you that you could not send more than 1,000 per day, or at once? Then simply you send the amount permissible at that moment and you send the rest later in the day. Or tomorrow. Simple!!! It just means that you would make two separate payments.

Oh, I have a headache already from the stress of moving through town, and now this. I am not a very young man, you know Mr Murray. I would not like a partnership that will be detrimental to my health.

It's really simple, Mr Murray. I can always make you see the simple side of things, but my patience is limited... very limited.

I wait for your comments. Remember we are running against time. I expect a response in the next few hours.

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I don't know what you're angry with me for

Sent: Wed, 01 Jun 2005 15:28:02

Dear Mr Muster,

I have just read the last email you sent me, and I have to tell you, I am not at all happy about its contents. Nor am I happy at the way in which you addressed me in the email: I do not take kindly to being addressed like a naughty child. This is no way to address a business partner, Mr Muster. Have you forgotten that we are supposed to be putting the past behind us and forging ahead with a new working relationship? If the contents of your last email are anything to go by, it would seem that you have indeed forgotten this.

Anyway, I don't know what you're angry with me for. I was simply trying to follow your instructions to the letter, and without question. It's not my fault if I can't transfer the money to Mr Idhe via Western Union because his fees are greater than the maximum amount allowed per transfer! It was you who asked me to send the fees that way, so if anyone is to blame here for the delay, it is either you or Mr Idhe. People who live in glass houses should not throw stones, Mr Muster... and especially not at their business partners.

And as for you accusing me of breaking our confidentiality agreement, I have already told you that I didn't tell the Western Union agent a thing about our transaction. All I told her was that I was paying a lawyer; not a thing more. So don't you go accusing me of indulging in idle "chit chat" about our transaction. Perhaps you ought to engage your brain before you commit your thoughts to an email in the future.

Mr Muster, I wrote to you in order to explain a slight problem and to ask for your advice. I was hoping for a measured, helpful and reasonable response from you. I was not expecting the shower of invective and abuse that I actually got from you in return.

It is not my fault if you have a headache and it is making you tetchy. If you have a headache, take some pills and go and lie down until you feel better. Kindly don't take it out on me.

Now then, once I had waded through the torrent of petulant abuse in your last email, I found that you actually came up with a reasonable-sounding plan at the end of it: to make two separate Western Union payments. As you seem to be unable to get hold of Mr Idhe's bank account details for some reason - had you even considered telephoning his secretary back at the office? - this is precisely what I will do.

However, it is too late for me to travel back into town again today; I am booked up solid with appointments for the rest of the day. The first payment will have to wait until tomorrow morning.

Therefore, kindly inform Mr Idhe that I will be transferring 999 to him tomorrow morning. I shall transfer the remainder of the money the following day.

And before you respond to this email, Mr Muster, please remember that we are supposed to be business partners. I am bending over backwards here to try and work with you in a positive manner, and I am simply not prepared to put up with any more abusive emails from you. In short, kindly remember your manners.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I don't know what you're angry with me for

Sent: Wed, 01 Jun 2005 17:59:11 +0100 (BST)

Dear Mr Murray,

I read through your email and I think I am a little more "sane" now.

I have had a chance to rest and recuperate. You have to understand that as a Swiss banker in the past, I was subjected to a clock tight schedule and I guess this has not changed. In the banking industry as you know, "time is money". In our case here, I see it as the same. I guess maybe I am eager to get my share of this money in my hands.

I have indeed turned a new leaf on your agreement to my terms of "not getting under my skin", but I guess "old habits" are hard to put aside. But trust me, I do respect your comments in the last email and I have to say that you read me right; I was a little edgy earlier in the day... maybe due to the stress. At my age, I should not be doing this much thinking. The doctor says it can catch up with me later. That's one of the reasons why I retired.

Mr Murray, all I want us to do is to get this right and do the right things at the right time. At this stage, I would not like things running amok as I have too much invested in it, so you can say I have more to lose.

I do respect you as a business partner, don't get me wrong... but I can't lie when I say I have some doubts (with regards to confidentiality), and I think that is what a real partner should do: let the other partner know everything so everybody knows where they stand.

You can say it's like a temporary marriage. I am sure you and Mrs Murray have your little fits once in a while over very trivial issues. It can be likened to this, but it's not the same, I know.

I guess I always read other meanings into some things you say.

Believe me, I have tried earlier in the week to call Mr Ihde's office to get in touch with his secretary, but I guess she has taken a leave as the boss is not around. All I get is the automated messaging service. I will ask Mr Ihde about this.

One thing I do appreciate is a partner that trusts in me as I do them. I have to say that this is something I will like us to focus on, because I think without trust; there would not be a solid partnership. Can we call it a truce?

All we have to do is to forge forward in this deal and I think this deal is very worth both our whiles. Don't you think Mr Murray?

I will give you my word to make more enquiries with regards to any comments you make in any emails before I react, I promise.

As you suggested, I will inform Mr Ihde that we will be transferring 999 to him tomorrow morning and the balance of the money the following day.

Kindly forgive my comments and proceed as planned at your own pace (but not too slow please!).

I will wait for a response from you later today or tomorrow and I will let you know Mr Ihde's comments later tonight. At least if he has the first part of the payment, he will consider us seriously on this case, I guess.

Kindly proceed as you have informed me. I will be in touch shortly.

Respectfully,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I have made the first Western Union transfer

Sent: Thu, 02 Jun 2005 11:33:11

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email. I am pleased to see that you appear to have calmed down somewhat and remembered your manners. That's much more like it.

You will be pleased to hear that I have made the first Western Union transfer: I travelled into town first thing this morning and transferred 999 to Mr Idhe. After the experience I had at the Western Union agent yesterday, I decided to go to a different agent this morning. Rest assured, Mr Muster, that I did not breathe a word of our transaction to the agent. I simply transferred the money with the minimum of fuss and conversation, and then left.

According to the Western Union agent, Mr Idhe will probably have to collect the money in US dollars, seeing as he is picking it up in California. I hope this will be acceptable. Presumably, as he is a lawyer of international repute he will have a foreign currency bank account in which he can deposit the money.

I have attached a scanned copy of the Western Union receipt to this email. I don't think that Mr Idhe will actually need to take it to the Western Union agent in order to collect the money, but I thought it might come in useful. The Western Union agent was not sure whether or not Mr Idhe would have to show any identification when he collects the money, but she advised me that it would be worthwhile for him to take along his passport or driver's licence just in case.

Please inform Mr Idhe that the money has been transferred as soon as possible, and get back to me as soon as it is in his hands. Presumably he will now be able to start working on our behalf. Tell Mr Idhe that I will transfer the rest of the money tomorrow.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

Gilbert's forged Western Union receipt

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I have made the first Western Union transfer - Please Read

Sent: Thu, 02 Jun 2005 13:19:47 +0100 (BST)

Dear Mr Murray,

Thank you for the email. I am sorry I could not get back to you yesterday. My internet connections had a few problems. But they are working fine now.

I am pleased to hear that you used another Western Union agent and I would think it was a very commendable move on your part.

I have the Western Union receipt with me. I did notice one error though: Mr Ihde's name was spelled as "Craig Idhe" on the receipt. I will like you to take a close look at the receipt and confirm this.

The correct spelling of his name as I gave it to you was "Craig Ihde". I don't know if this will be a problem for Mr Ihde when picking up the funds, especially if he will be using his passport and his name on the passport is "Craig Ihde" and not "Craig Idhe".

Please do confirm to me before 5pm if you can have this changed, or if you can confirm from the Western Union agent if this will delay the pickup of the funds.

I will wait for your response before I give Mr Ihde the necessary details for the pickup of the funds later in the day.

Kindly do get back to me soon.

Regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I cannot apologise enough for my error

Sent: Thu, 02 Jun 2005 14:14:54

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email. I cannot apologise enough for the error I made regarding Mr Ihde's name. That was inexcusably remiss of me. Looking back through my emails, I seem to have been mis-spelling Mr Ihde's name right from the word go. That was wrong of me, and I deserve to be punished for my mistake... although not as much as the evil Mr de Balint Jnr deserves to be punished for the extreme wickedness of his drugs-related crimes.

I called the Western Union agent as soon as I read your email and explained the situation to her. She assured me that this will not be a problem; apparently, they come across mis-spelled names quite often on Western Union forms. The agent assured me that as long as Mr Ihde can confirm the rest of the information on the Western Union receipt - ie his address, the amount and the MTCN - there will not be a problem when he comes to collect the money.

This little episode just goes to show, Mr Muster, that you are not the only one who makes irritating little mistakes. Neither of us are perfect in this regard, it seems.

Please pass on the appropriate details to Mr Ihde, and get back to me as soon as the money is in his hands.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I cannot apologise enough for my error

Sent: Thu, 02 Jun 2005 19:26:45 +0100 (BST)

Dear Mr Murray,

Thank you for the email. Well I trust that we are both learning how to relate with each other. I am happy about this.

I have just tried to get in touch with Mr Ihde at the hotel at which he is staying, but the receptionist says he is not picking up his hotel room phone. I think he must be out of the hotel. Anyway, he does have to be in court.

I will try and get him later tonight to let him know that you have sent the funds and he can go and pick it up.

I will be in touch. If I don't get back to you tonight I will get in touch with you earlier tomorrow morning.

Kindly do keep in touch.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I will wait to hear from you before I transfer the rest of the money

Sent: Fri, 03 Jun 2005 09:33:52

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email. I am slightly disappointed to hear that Mr Ihde has not collected the money from the Western Union agent yet; however, I can well understand that being a lawyer of international repute as he is, he must have a rather busy schedule. Hopefully he will manage to fit in a trip to a Western Union agent as early as possible today.

Given that I carelessly spelled Mr Ihde's name incorrectly when I transferred the money yesterday, I will wait to hear from you before I transfer the rest of the money, to make sure that Mr Ihde has managed to collect my first transfer without any problems. As soon as I hear that my money is in his hands, I will transfer the remainder of his fee.

Please let me know as soon as you hear from Mr Ihde.

Incidentally, I thought I should let you know that my client Gladys passed away yesterday. The poor dear has been terribly down ever since I told her that you were not interested in pursuing a relationship with her, and I heard from the milkman first thing this morning that apparently she took a massive overdose of sleeping pills yesterday.

Would you like me to pass on your condolences to her family, Mr Muster? I am sure that they would appreciate it. I was going to send them a card later today. If you would like to me add a small note of condolence from yourself, please do let me know, and give me an idea of what you would like me to write. It seems like the right and decent thing to do, in my view.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I will wait to hear from you - Please Read

Sent: Fri, 03 Jun 2005 12:13:39 +0100 (BST)

Dear Mr Murray,

Thank you for the email. I am very sorry to hear about your friend Gladys. Please do send my condolences to her family.

For now, I think we have a very pressing matter on hand which will need more of your attention.

I could not get back to you yesterday about the pickup of the funds by Mr Ihde. When I got in touch with him at his hotel by telephone, he said he was running on a very busy schedule and he told me that he might not be able to pick up the funds till later in the day yesterday. I did give him my email address to send me an email for confirmation that he did get the funds.

Surprisingly, I got two emails in this morning and I have copied them below accordingly.

In the first email I received he wrote:

QUOTE

"I just returned from Western Union office. They can't find the transfer under the MTCN number you sent me. They think it is not in their system yet and suggested I come back tomorrow AM at which time it should be there. Unfortunately, I will be out of contact the remainder of today due to a commitment (it's 1310 Pacific Daylight Time). Otherwise I would check later today. So I will go back to Western Union at 0900 tomorrow. Hopefully it will be there by then."

END OF QUOTE

In another email he wrote:

QUOTE

"It's 2300 hrs and I just got back to the hotel. Checked Western Union online to track the wire transfer. Still no record of it. What could have gone wrong? They can't find anything with the MTCN number you sent (4836322196). Please do confirm with the agent from where the funds were sent. Will be in touch with you again tomorrow."

END OF QUOTE

Mr Murray, kindly do rectify this issue with the Western Union agents, as I have also just now checked the wire status online and it does not exist.

You can verify this yourself before you troop down to the Western Union agent. I am sure you can view it at https://www.westernunion.co.uk/asp/orderStatus.asp?country=GB.

Kindly do have the agent sort and rectify this minor setback. I will wait to hear from you in a few hours.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I will sort this out immediately

Sent: Fri, 03 Jun 2005 12:30:47

Dear Mr Muster,

I am dismayed to hear that Mr Ihde has been unable to collect the money that I transferred to him yesterday.

I've just checked the MTCN number myself on the Western Union website as you suggested, and you're right: the transfer doesn't show up. I can't think what the matter can be.

I am extremely concerned that I handed over 1,000 to the Western Union agent yesterday and there now appears to be no trace of it. I have cancelled my appointments for early this afternoon and I am going to head off into town right now to get to the bottom of the matter.

I will get back to you as soon as I return. For now, please pass on my apologies to Mr Ihde for any inconvenience this may have caused him. I can appreciate that he is a busy man and the last thing he needs is to have his time wasted in this fashion.

I will get back to you as soon as I have found out what the problem is.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

PS. I will add a brief note from you to the bottom of the card I am writing to Gladys' family, and I will drop it into them on my way into town. I am sure that they will be touched by your concern.

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Problem solved

Sent: Fri, 03 Jun 2005 14:43:44

Dear Mr Muster,

I write with good news. I have just come back from town, where I went to the Western Union agent in order to find out what had happened to the money I transferred yesterday. I am pleased to be able to tell you that everything is now sorted out, and that Mr Ihde will now definitely be able to collect the money I transferred to him.

I asked to see the manager as soon as I got to the Western Union office, and I explained to him that the MTCN of my transfer did not show up on the computer at Mr Ihde's Western Union agent, and that it does not show up on the Western Union website either. The manager telephoned Western Union's UK head office to enquire about this. He spent quite some time on the telephone talking to their technical people, and eventually got to the bottom of the problem.

Apparently the reason for my transfer not appearing on the Western Union computer system is that Western Union in the UK are currently in the middle of upgrading their computer hardware. This has apparently resulted in what they called "internet connectivity" problems, and apparently mine is not the only transfer to have mone missing over the past ten days or so. What this means is that the transfer is definitely in the system - the manager showed it to me on his computer - but it is not showing up on Mr Ihde's agent's computer system, or on the Western Union website, because of these "internet connectivity" problems.

However, it turns out that this is not a problem, because there is a simple solution. The manager told me exactly what Mr Ihde's agent needs to do in order to access details of the transfer and gain access to the money. Apparently, Mr Ihde's Western Union agent simply needs to initiate procedure WU-573 on their computer system, entering the money transfer control number that I gave to you. This procedure, which apparently gives the agent access to all transfers that have got "stuck" in the system, will make the transfer available to the agent, meaning that Mr Ihde will be able to collect the money.

The manager was rather surprised that Mr Ihde's agent had not done this already: apparently it is standard procedure for Western Union agents when things like this happen.

Anyway, I am sure you will agree that this is extremely good news: it means that Mr Ihde should be able to collect the money I transferred to him immediately, simply by instructing his Western Union agent to initiate procedure WU-573.

Apologies once again for the inconvenience. Please get back to me as soon as Mr Ihde has collected the money from the Western Union agent.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

PS. I popped round to see Gladys' family on my way into town to drop off the condolences card from the two of us, but there was nobody in so I just put the card through the letterbox. This is a terribly sad business: I know for a fact that Gladys will be sorely missed at the local Darby and Joan club. Mind you, looking on the bright side, at least she made sure she was up to date with her membership fees before she died, so I'm not out of pocket.

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: Problem solved

Sent: Fri, 03 Jun 2005 18:20:02 +0200

Dear Mr Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I have read through your email and I have already sent the instructions to Mr Ihde via email also. Hopefully, he will check his email.

I will also give him a call later in the day and I hope I will catch him at the hotel.

This error has delayed a lot of progress we could have made, but no matter; we can still make up for lost time.

I will contact you later in the day or tomorrow morning and give you a progress report.

I will be in touch shortly.

Best regards to Gladys' family.

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Has Mr Idhe collected the money yet?

Sent: Sat, 04 Jun 2005 10:54:12

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for your email. I presume that Mr Ihde has managed to collect the money from the Western Union agency by now. Please confirm that this is indeed the case. If so, I will transfer the remaining amount to him first thing on Monday morning.

I will be working today, unfortunately: I had to cancel a number of appointments yesterday in order to revisit the Western Union agency in town, so I am trying to make up for lost time by seeing my clients this afternoon instead.

Incidentally, I had a visit from Gladys' son, Ronald, this morning. He was not at all happy about the little note I added to the condolence card from you. It turns out that he blames you for the death of his mother: he told me that she had left a suicide note which explained that she was ending her life because she had been cruelly rejected by a Swiss banker. Ronald thought that it was in extremely poor taste for you to leave a condolence note after the part you had to play in her death.

I must say, Mr Muster, I did think it was rather unfair of Ronald to blame you for the death of his mother. Admittedly, your heartless rejection does appear to have had some part to play in the affair, but I don't think it's fair to place the blame for Gladys' death on you. Well, not quite all of it, anyway. I did try to stick up for you, but obviously Ronald was stricken with grief, and it's not easy to reason with people when they are in such a state. If I were you, I would rethink any plans you have of sending flowers to her funeral. I don't think that would go down at all well.

Anyway, I look forward to hearing good news from you later in the day. Do have a pleasant weekend.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: Has Mr Idhe collected the money yet?

Sent: Sat, 04 Jun 2005 11:50:37 +0100 (BST)

Dear Mr Murray,

The problem still persists. Mr Ihde has been unable to solve the problem with the WU transfer. I have copied you an email from him below:

QUOTE

"Hi Adrian,

I have just returned from Western Union office. They were unsuccessful in retrieving the information. I gave them copy of your email with WU 573 listed. They couldn't make it work, so called Western Union main office. They also tried and were not successful.

I believe you will have to contact your WU office, retrieve your funds and wire the funds directly over to my bank account. The US seems totally incapable of solving the problem. Sorry for the inconvenience. I tried.

Unfortunately, I could not get the case adjourned on Friday and I will be in the States till late Wednesday. Hopefully, I will be through with the case by then.

Regards,

Craig"

END OF QUOTE

I will suggest that you try and visit the WU agents and get your money back.

I will wait for Mr Ihde's bank details so we can transfer the funds to his bank account directly. The time I was trying to save has already been wasted. No matter, we will work this out.

I am also very disturbed by this news from Gladys' family. I am not responsible for anyone's death and I think they should get their facts straight. It is not my fault that Gladys and I were not compatible.

I will wait for further instructions or an update with regards to the WU problem. Let me know when you have retrieved your funds.

Keep in touch.

Best regards,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I was surprised and dismayed to read your last email

Sent: Sun, 05 Jun 2005 13:56:28

Dear Mr Muster,

I was surprised and dismayed to read your last email. How can Mr Ihde have failed yet again to collect the money from the Western Union agent? Are you sure he knows what he is doing?

I have to say, Mr Muster, I hope Mr Ihde is able to carry out his duties as a lawyer with a touch more competence than he has shown in attempting to collect his fee. I have been most disappointed in his performance so far. The man is delaying this entire transaction.

This is all turning out to be very inconvenient for me. I am a busy man, Mr Muster, and I cannot afford to keep wasting my time by travelling into town to visit the Western Union agency again and again. Kindly ask Mr Ihde to buck his ideas up.

Still, I am glad to see that you have come round to my idea of transferring the money directly into Mr Ihde's bank account. If you remember, I did suggest this myself right from the start. I hate to say so, but if you had followed my advice back then when I first suggested the idea Mr Muster, the money would be safely in Mr Ihde's bank account by now, and we would be well on the way to completing this transaction.

Well, send me Mr Ihde's bank account details as soon as you can, and I will cancel the Western Union transfer I made and transfer the money directly into his bank account. Then hopefully we can start to make some real progress here.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I was surprised and dismayed to read your last email

Sent: Mon, 06 Jun 2005 10:16:34 +0100 (BST)

Dear Mr Murray,

Thank you for the email.

I am very sorry to say that I doubted your suggestion, but one thing you also have to put in mind is that it is not obviously Mr Ihde's fault that the Western Union services in the UK are incompetent.

You remember that you were the one that informed me that they were having "internet connectivity" problems!! Western Union is the easiest payment method to use and it is widely used worldwide. Even a five year old could pick up money paid via Western Union!! The problem is from your end (the agents) and you should not blame Mr Ihde. I am just as irritated as you are.

You are not the only one with a busy or tight schedule and you also have to keep in mind that Mr Ihde informed me that he tried tirelessly and sat at the WU agent's office for about an hour and a half trying to sort out the problem. I am sure this took out a lot of his time, which he could have used in preparing for his case, or the time he could have taken out to relax.

Having all this in mind, I would like you to please keep a clear mind and I hope when you get to meet Mr Ihde, you will be able to show some respect in his presence.

I have Mr Ihde's bank details already, but I have the details for his offshore account in the US. He gave me his UK and Swiss account details also, but he says there will be no way to confirm if the funds have actually been credited into either of these accounts until he gets back to Zurich. Anyway, that is not an issue right now. Let's move on with the matter at hand.

Bank name: Bank of America

Account name: Craig E Ihde

Type of account: Checking

Account number: 03956-17727

Routing code: 121000358

Bank address: Brentwood District, 11911 San Vicente Blvd, Los Angeles, CA 90049

I hope you will be able to cancel the WU transfer?

You can wire the funds to his account as you suggested and let me know when you do it. Also, you could send me a copy of the wire just in case, but let me know when it has been done at your bank. Everybody has been inconvenienced, but we can all put this aside and we can all clear our minds.

I will be in touch. Kindly keep me updated.

I am sorry if you have been inconvenienced. Kindly do accept my apologies.

Respectfully,

Adrian

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: Thank you for the bank account details

Sent: Mon, 06 Jun 2005 10:56:02

Dear Mr Muster,

Thank you for sending me details of Mr Ihde's offshore bank account. I will travel into town this afternoon, cancel the Western Union transfer that Mr Ihde failed to collect and transfer the money directly into his bank account. Although this will inconvenience me yet again, at least it will put an end to our money transfer problems. After all, nothing can go wrong with a simple bank to bank transfer. I will scan in a copy of the bank receipt and send it to you when I get back from town.

You mentioned that you hope I will show some respect to Mr Ihde when I finally get to meet him. I too hope that I will be able to show him some respect. However, I have always been of the opinion that respect must be earned, and as far as I am concerned, Mr Ihde has a lot of ground to make up if he wishes to earn my respect.

On another matter, I am sorry to say that Gladys' son paid me another visit first thing this morning. He really is very angry about his mother's death, and he demanded to know exactly what had gone on between the two of you. I explained things as best I could and tried to calm him down, but he insisted that I give him your contact details so that he could get in touch with you directly and sort things out with you. I didn't want to give him your details, but he really was terribly upset and I was afraid he might turn violent if I didn't give them to him, so in the end I gave him your email address.

I do hope you don't mind, Mr Muster. Please understand that there really wasn't anything else I could have done. Ronald is a very large man and I was anxious to avoid a scene in the office as I had a client due at any moment. Anyway, I suppose you can expect to receive an email from him in the near future. Hopefully you will be able to resolve matters with him personally.

I will get back to you with a copy of the bank receipt when I return from town later today.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

From: Ronald Knight

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN PLAYING AT WITH MY MOTHER?

Sent: Mon, 06 Jun 2005 12:01:30

MUSTER,

WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN PLAYING AT WITH MY MOTHER? WHERE DO YOU GET OFF, LEADING LONELY LITTLE OLD LADIES UP THE GARDEN PATH AND RAISING THEIR EXPECTATIONS ONLY TO DROP THEM LIKE A STONE WHENEVER YOU FEEL LIKE IT?

I SUPPOSE YOU KNOW MY MOTHERS DEATH WAS ALL DOWN TO YOU? AS I SEE THINGS, ITS ALL YOUR FAULT MUSTER. MY MOTHER HAS BEEN LONELY EVER SINCE MY FATHER DIED AND ALL SHE WAS LOOKING FOR WAS A BIT OF COMPANIONSHIP IN HER OLD AGE. SHE DESERVED IT, I CAN TELL YOU. AND THEN YOU COME ALONG, PROMISE HER THE BLOODY WORLD AND THEN LET HER DOWN LIKE THE BASTARD YOU UNDOUBTEDLY ARE.

YOU DO KNOW ITS DOWN TO YOU THAT SHE KILLED HERSELF, DONT YOU? WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING? WHAT DID YOU TELL HER THAT MADE HER GET HER HOPES UP SO HIGH ONLY TO BE DASHED WHEN YOU SHOWED YOUR TRUE COLOURS? WERE YOU AFTER HER MONEY? IS THAT IT? WERE YOU AFTER MY INHERITANCE?

ID LIKE YOU TO EXPLAIN EXACTLY WHAT THE HELL YOU WERE UP TO, YOU NASTY PIECE OF WORK. MY MOTHERS DEAD NOW. THATS ON YOUR CONSCIENCE. AND WHAT WERE YOU THINKING SENDING THAT BLOODY NOTE? DID YOU REALLY THINK THAT WOULD MAKE EVERYTHING BETTER? DID YOU THINK ID FORGIVE YOU AFTER THAT? YOURE A CAD, MUSTER. A CAD AND A BOUNDER.

EXPLAIN YOURSELF YOU HORRIBLE LITTLE MAN. WHAT WERE YOU UP TO? COME ON, LETS HEAR IT.

RONNY KNIGHT

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: I have transferred the money into Mr Ihde's bank account

Sent: Mon, 06 Jun 2005 14:48:32

Dear Mr Muster,

I have just returned from town, where I cancelled the Western Union transfer I made last week and transferred Mr Ihde's fee - all of it - into his bank account. Please find attached a copy of the receipt. I trust that Mr Ihde will now be able to start working on our behalf on this matter.

While we are on the subject of Mr Ihde, do you know how long his current case is going to take? It strikes me that although we have experienced a number of delays in getting Mr Ihde's fee to him, this doesn't really matter: all of his time seems to have been taken up with the American divorce case anyway.

Do you actually know when Mr Ihde will be finished with this divorce case? I do hope it won't be long. After all, he won't be much use to us if he's spending all of his time in the courts of California when we need him on the ground working for us in Zurich.

I do hope that we will not come to regret your decision to employ Mr Ihde's services in this matter, Mr Muster. Please get back to me and let me know when he is actually going to start working on our behalf and earning his not inconsiderable fee.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

Gilbert's forged bank transfer receipt

From: Adrian Muster

To: Gilbert Murray

Subject: Re: I have the payment copy receipt

Sent: Mon, 06 Jun 2005 16:50:02 +0200

Mr (Murray, Kester, Steve, Ronny),

Thank you for the email. I thought you would be at least a little more ingenious with your bank receipt. Bartletts Bank?? That is so out of vogue.

I think I have earned my place on your website, but this is becoming a little boring for my liking.

I must say that I think I have given "YOU" a run for your money, ain't it??

Well, next time, I think it would be best not to give so much information on your website. I am really bored and really I don't have anything to do, but you bore me my man. Other websites have come up with more ingenious means for scamming scammers.

Remember, the more information you give, the more improved the scammers become. It's only a matter of time. What is Google there for?

But I must give it to you man, you do your research. Thumbs up.

Anyway, thanks for helping with my own project and website, "How to bust a scambuster". It's a website for scammers, so they can update themselves. So, I suggest you get a new angle: all your secrets are now mine.

Anyway, this is my new email address*. I hope you like it? Email me anytime old chap.

It has been nice working with you. Or should I say on you. Cheers.

Love always,

Adrian

* The above email came from the following address: adrian.muster121.278.125.15e-mailtoallmotherfuckers
@securemail.net.

From: Gilbert Murray

To: Adrian Muster

Subject: So, you've worked it out at last

Sent: Mon, 06 Jun 2005 16:42:42

Dear "Mr Muster",

So, you've worked it out at last. Well done. It only took you about four weeks to work out that you were being had. The penny obviously dropped for you a little sooner than it does for most scammers. You obviously have a few more brain cells to rub together than the average 419 scammer... but thankfully not all that many more.

You advised me not to post so much information on my website. Well, although posting information on the website does mean that there is always the risk that a scammer will be able to discover that he's being led up the garden path, thankfully most scammers seem to be too stupid to even think of carrying out a simple internet search. It's taken you nearly four weeks to think of doing so.

Besides, the benefits of posting the information onto the website far outweigh the disadvantages: it raises awareness about what pathetic little conmen like you get up to, so that less people are in danger of being scammed by you. Also, it's provided thousands of people around the world with the opportunity to laugh themselves silly at your ridiculous and amateurish antics. If I may say so, "Mr Muster", you play the fool brilliantly. It is almost as if you were born to it.

By the way, I wish you the best of luck with the new website you're planning. You're going to need luck if you're hoping to educate 419 scammers on how to avoid being busted: they (or should I say "you") don't strike me as the most intelligent group of people in the world.

Anyway, I must go now. It has been tremendous fun toying with you for the past month. No doubt you'll be glad to hear that you've provided thousands of people with a lot of pleasure.

Best regards,

Gilbert Murray

PS. Thanks for the bank account details, by the way. I'm sure that the authorities will find that information very useful.